Some people say that it is possible to tell a lot about a person’s culture and character from their choice of clothes. Do you agree or disagree?
Sample Response
Many believe that fashion choices communicate information about an individual’s personality and culture. I am largely in agreement though I would concede globalization has partly obscured these distinctions.
Those who argue that a person’s culture and character cannot be determined from their clothing point to the impact of globalization. There are now international companies like Nike, Tommy Hilfiger, and Louis Vuitton that manufacture and ship identical clothes all around the world for consumers. These consumers are influenced by the same media and admire the same public figures. This modern convergence of production and culture means that disparate nations are more similar than at any point in human history. It is not unusual to see an individual living in South America, for instance, wearing the same shoes and clothing as someone in Asia or Europe.
Nonetheless, fashion preferences still reveal what a person values and what they wish to project to the outside world. A person who wears a suit and tie appears professional and this likely matches their personality. If they dress very formally when at work it might also indicate the office culture in their country. For example, it is common in East Asian countries for workers to dress very formally for work while in Southeast Asia the clothing is more casual due to the tropical climate. There are also individual differences that are, on average, greater than the disparity between cultures. A person who is into sports is more likely to wear sporty clothes regardless of where they live. Social media and globalization can even contribute to this trend as a consumer can follow their favorite artist and emulate both their personality and fashion choices.
In conclusion, though globalization theoretically makes it more difficult to distinguish a person’s culture and character from their clothes, in fact, these choices continue to be revealing. This self-expression is one of the benefits of modern fashion.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Mark contrast clearly Original: in agreement though Suggested revision: in agreement, though Why it matters: A comma is needed before the contrasting subordinate clause.
- 2. Add complement marker Original: concede globalization Suggested revision: concede that globalization Why it matters: “Concede” requires “that” before this finite complement clause.
- 3. Improve word order Original: all around the world for consumers Suggested revision: to consumers around the world Why it matters: The revised order expresses distribution to consumers more naturally.
- 4. Separate independent clauses Original: appears professional and this Suggested revision: appears professional, and this Why it matters: A comma is needed before the coordinating conjunction joining two independent clauses.
- 5. Add clause comma Original: at work it Suggested revision: at work, it Why it matters: The introductory conditional clause needs a comma before the main clause.
- 6. Clarify contrast Original: for work while in Suggested revision: for work, while in Why it matters: The comma makes the contrast between the two regions easier to follow.
- 7. Use formal wording Original: is into sports Suggested revision: is interested in sports Why it matters: “Is interested in” is more appropriate for the essay’s formal register.
- 8. Strengthen causal link Original: as a consumer can follow Suggested revision: because consumers can follow Why it matters: “Because” states the causal relationship more directly, and the plural noun fits the general claim.
- 9. Clarify reference Original: emulate both their personality and fashion choices Suggested revision: emulate both that artist’s persona and fashion choices Why it matters: The revision removes the ambiguous pronoun and uses a more natural object of “emulate.”
- 10. Sentence rewrite Original: There are also individual differences that are, on average, greater than the disparity between cultures. Suggested revision: On average, individual differences can also be greater than cultural differences. Why it matters: The rewrite creates a parallel comparison between individual and cultural differences.
Suggested Rewrites
- in agreement though in agreement, though
- concede globalization concede that globalization
- all around the world for consumers to consumers around the world
- appears professional and this appears professional, and this
- at work it at work, it
- for work while in for work, while in
Why this response received Band 8.0
The response presents a nuanced, consistent position and develops both the globalising influence on clothing and the continuing value of fashion as cultural and personal evidence. Its main limitation is that a few claims about clothing reliably reflecting personality are asserted more readily than they are qualified. The best improvement would be to sharpen these claims and explain the distinction between what clothes suggest and what they can establish.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
The question is fully addressed through a clear qualified agreement supported by well-developed explanations and relevant examples.
Qualify the claims linking formal or sporty clothing to character so the argument distinguishes reasonable inference from certainty.
Coherence and Cohesion
Ideas progress logically through a well-controlled contrast, with cohesive devices and paragraphing used effectively throughout.
Make the transition from cultural differences to individual sporting preferences slightly more explicit within the second main paragraph.
Lexical Resource
A wide and precise vocabulary is used flexibly, with natural topic-specific expressions and only minor repetition.
Vary repeated references to personality, culture, and formal dress where a more exact synonym would preserve nuance.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A wide range of complex structures is handled accurately, and the response is largely free from grammatical error.
Refine occasional dense sentences by checking modifier placement and clause balance for maximum clarity.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Some people say that it is possible to tell a lot about a person’s culture and character from their choice of clothes. Do you agree or disagree?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.