Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Dancing plays an important role in a culture.

Same questionCompare 2 different answers (Band 6.5)

Sample Response

1

Throughout human historyThroughout the human history, dancing has always been an important part of our culture, society and ritual. This is considered one ofconsidered as one of the most effective and ancient ways of communication and people all over the world have their traditional dancedancing styles that not only reflect their unique traditionsunique way of traditions but also their history and culture. I quite agree that dancing plays a crucialvery crucial role in a culture. If we look back at historylook back to the history, dancing was a form of entertainment and an excellent form of artexcellent outline of arts in all civilisations. It was even a way of performing ritual acts in many civilisations. The main reason it representspresents the culture of a society is because it is a fascinating combination of different forms of artarts including music, songs, costumes, vibrant colours, performance and storytellingstory. Each of these art forms presents a unique national identitya unique identity of a nation and thus when they are combined together, they become an icon of the nationthe icon of a nation. If we observe the art forms used in a dancing performance, we are sure to get a very vivid impression of a particular society and itstheir way of life. Again, dancing has many formsthe dancing has many forms and it varies from civilisation to civilisation. Even a small tribe thatwho has different cultural aspects has different body movementsa different way of body movements, costumes and music while performing dances. Thus dancing also teaches us about the historypast history and traditions. For instance, ancient dancesdancing that used the body and face paintbody and facial painting, quite primitive costumes and body movements are totally different from modern dancingdifferent than the modern dancing and both of them representrepresents two different periods, civilisations and cultures. Finally, people’s presentation of happiness, joy, sadness, prayer, story and purposes through different forms of dancing is an excellent means of conveying human feelings and probably a very ancient mean of communication. As communication is the primary way of expressing culture and tradition, dancing plays a vital role in doing so. To sum up, dancing is always a part of our history, tradition and culture and it helps keep people's traditions alive through the ages.

Overall assessment

Why this response received Band 6.5

The response presents a firm position and develops several relevant ways in which dance embodies and transmits culture, supported by a concrete historical comparison. The main limitation is repetition of broad claims, compounded by awkward collocations and recurring grammatical errors. The highest-priority improvement is to organise the ideas into distinct paragraphs and express each cultural function with more precise, naturally controlled language.

Band score breakdown

IELTS Writing Criteria Scores

TR

Task Response

7.0
Scoring rule

The position is clear throughout, and several relevant cultural functions of dance are explained with appropriate supporting detail.

Next step

Make the argument more incisive by reducing repeated claims and developing one especially specific example of cultural transmission.

CC

Coherence and Cohesion

6.0
Scoring rule

Ideas follow a generally logical sequence with clear signposting, but the lack of paragraph breaks and some repetition weaken overall organisation.

Next step

Group the discussion into separate body paragraphs for artistic identity, historical continuity, and communication, each with a focused topic sentence.

LR

Lexical Resource

6.5
Scoring rule

A reasonably wide range of cultural and artistic vocabulary is used, though several word choices and collocations are imprecise or unnatural.

Next step

Refine collocations involving tradition, art forms, historical periods, and communication, while avoiding redundant phrases such as repeated references to history.

GRA

Grammatical Range and Accuracy

6.0
Scoring rule

The response uses varied complex structures, but errors in articles, agreement, comparison forms, and noun forms occur regularly.

Next step

Prioritise subject-verb agreement and article control, then proofread complex sentences for accurate comparison and singular-plural forms.

Put the feedback to work

Write this task while it is fresh

Try the same task now. It helps you remember the feedback and write better next time.

IELTS Writing Task 2

Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Dancing plays an important role in a culture.

Your response

Words0
40:00

Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.