The growth in the job market is demanding for exit interviews with the employees. How far do you think it is relevant? To what extent do you support this view?
Sample Response
During the last decade, organising interviews with staffs who decided to leave a workplace has become popular in many companies. I strongly agree with the idea of exit interviews and believe that it will help organisations to improve its performance and maximise the profit of the business. In my opinion, the exit interviews are important for the businesses who want to expand its share market because the performance of the company positively correlates with the employees’ satisfaction. For example, happy and motivated staff can work much better than unhappy people. Additionally, the level of happiness varies from person to person and during the exit interviews staff can express more open and honest opinions what was missing in the company. For this reason, I believe that exit interviews are necessary in order to understand the reasons key employees leave a company as well as bring to gather the ideas how to improve the company and inspire others to continue to work for the organisation. The next point that needs to be taken into consideration is that the exit interviews are relevant to a high extent to companies in the competitive job market. The quicker the organisation recognises its weaknesses and causes of losing employees, the quicker this organisation becomes more attractive to other people to work in. Moreover, the financial performance of such companies is better than those who do not try to improve staff satisfaction in the workplace. To sum up, I firmly believe that, there is no doubt, it is important to organise the exit interviews in order to find out the cause employees’ leave their jobs.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Natural time phrase Original: During the last decade Suggested revision: Over the past decade Why it matters: This is the more natural phrase for describing a period leading up to the present.
- 2. Uncountable staff noun Original: staffs Suggested revision: staff Why it matters: Staff is normally uncountable when referring collectively to employees.
- 3. Use present perfect Original: who decided to leave Suggested revision: who have decided to leave Why it matters: The present perfect better connects the employees' decision with the current interview.
- 4. Match plural subject Original: it Suggested revision: they Why it matters: The pronoun must agree with the plural noun exit interviews.
- 5. Match plural possessive Original: its Suggested revision: their Why it matters: Their must agree with the plural noun organisations.
- 6. Use concise collocation Original: maximise the profit of the business Suggested revision: maximise business profits Why it matters: Business profits is a more concise and natural collocation here.
- 7. Remove generic article Original: the exit interviews are important Suggested revision: exit interviews are important Why it matters: No definite article is needed when discussing exit interviews in general.
- 8. Use relative that Original: the businesses who Suggested revision: businesses that Why it matters: That is appropriate for organisations, and the generic plural does not need the definite article.
- 9. Correct market collocation Original: expand its share market Suggested revision: expand their market share Why it matters: Market share is the correct collocation, and their agrees with businesses.
- 10. Use precise adverb Original: work much better Suggested revision: work more effectively Why it matters: More effectively expresses work performance more precisely in formal writing.
- 11. Clarify opening phrase Original: during the exit interviews staff Suggested revision: during exit interviews, staff Why it matters: The introductory prepositional phrase needs a comma before the main clause.
- 12. Add linking preposition Original: opinions what was missing Suggested revision: opinions about what was missing Why it matters: About is required to connect opinions with their subject.
Suggested Rewrites
- During the last decade Over the past decade
- staffs staff
- who decided to leave who have decided to leave
- it they
- its their
- maximise the profit of the business maximise business profits
Why this response received Band 6.0
The response maintains a clear position and gives relevant reasons linking exit interviews to employee satisfaction and business performance. Its main weakness is that the argument remains somewhat repetitive and is presented as one long paragraph, while recurring grammatical and collocational errors reduce precision. The highest priority is to organise the two main ideas into distinct, fully developed paragraphs and edit sentence structures and word combinations for accuracy.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
A clear position is maintained, and relevant benefits are explained, although supporting ideas are somewhat repetitive and only moderately developed.
Develop each main reason with a more specific explanation or example showing how exit-interview findings produce measurable organisational improvements.
Coherence and Cohesion
The argument follows a broadly logical sequence and uses clear linking phrases, but the single-paragraph format weakens organisation.
Separate the introduction, each main reason, and the conclusion into purposeful paragraphs with clearer internal progression.
Lexical Resource
The response uses an adequate range of business-related vocabulary, but several inaccurate collocations and word forms reduce precision.
Replace awkward combinations such as references to market share and gathering ideas with natural, context-appropriate business expressions.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A mix of simple and complex structures communicates the message, though agreement, articles, pronouns, and clause construction contain recurring errors.
Proofread each sentence for subject-verb and pronoun agreement, then simplify clauses whose structure is difficult to control.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
The growth in the job market is demanding for exit interviews with the employees. How far do you think it is relevant? To what extent do you support this view?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.