The growth in the job market is demanding for exit interviews with the employees. How far do you think it is relevant? To what extent do you support this view?
This response is estimated at Band 6.0. Can you write a better one?
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Sample Response
Over the past decadeDuring the last decade, organising interviews with staffstaffs who have decided to leavewho decided to leave a workplace has become popular in many companies. I strongly agree with the idea of exit interviews and believe that theyit will help organisations to improve theirits performance and maximise business profitsmaximise the profit of the business. In my opinion, exit interviews are importantthe exit interviews are important for businesses thatthe businesses who want to expand their market shareexpand its share market because the performance of the company positively correlates with the employees’ satisfaction. For example, happy and motivated staff can work more effectivelywork much better than unhappy people. Additionally, the level of happiness varies from person to person and during exit interviews, staffduring the exit interviews staff can express more open and honest opinions about what was missingopinions what was missing in the company. For this reason, I believe that exit interviews are necessary in order to understand the reasons why key employees leavereasons key employees leave a company as well as bring togetherbring to gather the ideas about how to improveideas how to improve the company and inspire others to continue to work for the organisation. The next point that needs to be taken into consideration is that the exit interviews are highly relevant to companiesrelevant to a high extent to companies in the competitive job market. The quicker the organisation recognises its weaknesses and reasons for losing employeescauses of losing employees, the quicker this organisation becomes more attractive to other people to work in. Moreover, the financial performance of such companies is better than those who do not try to improve staff satisfaction in the workplace. To sum up, I firmly believe that, there is no doubt, it is important to organise the exit interviews in order to find out the cause employees’ leave their jobs.
Why this response received Band 6.0
The response maintains a clear position and gives relevant reasons linking exit interviews to employee satisfaction and business performance. Its main weakness is that the argument remains somewhat repetitive and is presented as one long paragraph, while recurring grammatical and collocational errors reduce precision. The highest priority is to organise the two main ideas into distinct, fully developed paragraphs and edit sentence structures and word combinations for accuracy.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
A clear position is maintained, and relevant benefits are explained, although supporting ideas are somewhat repetitive and only moderately developed.
Develop each main reason with a more specific explanation or example showing how exit-interview findings produce measurable organisational improvements.
Coherence and Cohesion
The argument follows a broadly logical sequence and uses clear linking phrases, but the single-paragraph format weakens organisation.
Separate the introduction, each main reason, and the conclusion into purposeful paragraphs with clearer internal progression.
Lexical Resource
The response uses an adequate range of business-related vocabulary, but several inaccurate collocations and word forms reduce precision.
Replace awkward combinations such as references to market share and gathering ideas with natural, context-appropriate business expressions.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A mix of simple and complex structures communicates the message, though agreement, articles, pronouns, and clause construction contain recurring errors.
Proofread each sentence for subject-verb and pronoun agreement, then simplify clauses whose structure is difficult to control.