In the future, we will have more and more leisure time as machines will replace many of the tasks we do at home and work now. Discuss the benefits this will bring and also the problem it will cause.
Sample Response
It is safe to say that robots and other powerful and intelligent machines will play an even greater role alongside humans in the futureaccompany humans even more in the future, and they will perform tasks that were historically performed by humansduties that historically belonged to us. As a result, we will enjoy more time off. To my mind, this evolution has its pros and cons which I aim to analyze in this essay. On the one hand, people will undeniablyOn the one hand, undeniably people will receive countless benefits when robots take over their usual tasks. With the large amount of free timemassive span of free time, people can take part in many recreational activitieshave many recreational activities that they could not pursuefulfil in the past - like travelling for longer periods of time. This tendency is expected to coincide with growth in the service industrycome along with the development in the service industry that accounts for a high percentage of a country's GDP. Additionally, the workforce is facing seriouscontentious problems regarding their mental and physical health. Oncehealth, once robots and smart machines come into usecome under usage, the workers will no longer be worried about such illnesses, which will reducesuch illness which will reduce the burden on the healthcare systemmedical system as well. On the other hand, all the drawbacks of it can not be contained easily, it has been proven by science that humans only survive by working, while they are working on their jobs, their body parts are also working, that is what keeps them healthy and physically controlled. But if our tasks are performed entirely by robotstasks are fully done by robots, we will become lethargic and this will be extremely harmful to our healthit is extremely negative for our health. People also find happiness in their jobs, which means that ifwhich means if they have too much time at leisuretoo much time relaxing, they might end up feeling bored rather than satisfied. In conclusion, I believe that robots replacing humans in daily tasks can have both positive and negative effectscan be positive and negative at the same time. Humans should try to balance the amount of work completed by robots with that completed by humansamount of robot-completed work with self-completed work in order to minimise the drawbacksterminate all the shortcomings.
Why this response received Band 6.0
The response presents several relevant benefits and problems and maintains a clear overall stance, supported by a fairly broad vocabulary. Its effectiveness is limited by the absence of paragraphing, long comma-linked sentences, and some exaggerated or imprecisely explained claims. The highest-priority improvement is to organise the two sides into separate paragraphs and develop each point through a concise, credible explanation before adding another idea.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
The response addresses both benefits and problems with several relevant ideas, although some claims are insufficiently explained or overly generalised.
Support each major claim with a credible causal explanation, especially the links to service-sector growth and health-system pressure.
Coherence and Cohesion
The argument follows a recognisable benefits-to-problems sequence, but presenting the entire essay as one paragraph and using comma splices weakens organisation.
Separate the introduction, benefits, problems, and conclusion into logical paragraphs and give each paragraph a clear central focus.
Lexical Resource
A reasonably wide vocabulary conveys nuanced ideas, but several ambitious expressions are imprecise or unnatural in context.
Choose more idiomatic combinations, replacing phrases such as massive span, come under usage, and terminate shortcomings with precise alternatives.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
There is a varied range of complex structures, but control is inconsistent in long sentences, with recurring comma splices and faulty clause boundaries.
Break long multi-clause sentences into controlled units and check that each independent clause is joined with correct punctuation or conjunctions.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
In the future, we will have more and more leisure time as machines will replace many of the tasks we do at home and work now. Discuss the benefits this will bring and also the problem it will cause.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.