To some people studying the past has little value in the modern world. Why do you think it is important to learn the past? What will be the effect if children are not taught history?
Sample Response
Some people give little credit and value of studying history as it is petty and in their opinion does not have any importance in the modern society. Other people,on the contrary, reckon that the past has prominent roles in understanding our modern life and taking important decisions for the future. So in this essay, I will consider both points of views and state my own assertion on the matter followed by the consequences if we do not teach history to our children.
In the modern world, it cannot be denied that examining the past could be unbelievably valuable in terms of understanding of our modern world problems. There is a saying that suggests that "history repeats itself", for this reason, if we delve into history, examine it without leaving any detail behind, we will have more opportunities to anticipate forthcoming problems and it is undeniable that problems would be solved very easily. Human conflicts, inventions and socials issues in all the ages are quite similar and this is what makes the study of past so important. Without studying the past we cannot understand why a certain civilization flourished among others and why nations were destroyed. This knowledge can give us such a wisdom that would help us progress further.
History has a great importance in our lives, in spite of the fact that there are people who think the past is useless and there is no point in studying history. However, it is undoubtedly true that an explicit future awaits the one who has delved into history. Thus teaching history to the children needs to be considered comprehensively. Because if children are not taught history, there will be consequences. For instance, lack of knowledge of the past of their country would have a tragic outcome in the society.
To conclude, studying and examining the past has a fundamental value in the modern world and it is undeniable that the effects of the children who are not taught history would be more catastrophic than anyone could imagine.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Correct the collocation Original: prominent roles Suggested revision: an important role Why it matters: The singular collocation “play an important role” fits the general function being described.
- 2. Use standard collocation Original: taking Suggested revision: making Why it matters: In standard English, people make decisions rather than take them.
- 3. Clarify the sequence Original: followed by the consequences Suggested revision: and discuss the consequences Why it matters: The original phrase does not clearly coordinate the two actions promised in the essay.
- 4. Improve the construction Original: in terms of understanding of our modern world problems Suggested revision: in terms of understanding problems in the modern world Why it matters: The revision removes the unnecessary “of” and clarifies which problems are meant.
- 5. Use adjective form Original: socials Suggested revision: social Why it matters: “Social” is the adjective required before the noun “issues.”
- 6. Use a natural phrase Original: in all the ages Suggested revision: throughout history Why it matters: “Throughout history” is the idiomatic expression for all historical periods.
- 7. Add the article Original: the study of past Suggested revision: the study of the past Why it matters: “The past” requires the definite article when used as a noun for earlier times.
- 8. Add introductory comma Original: Without studying the past we Suggested revision: Without studying the past, we Why it matters: A comma should separate the introductory phrase from the main clause.
- 9. Clarify the contrast Original: flourished among others Suggested revision: flourished while others did not Why it matters: The revision clearly expresses the intended contrast between successful and unsuccessful civilizations.
- 10. Remove the article Original: such a wisdom Suggested revision: such wisdom Why it matters: “Wisdom” is uncountable in this context and cannot take the article “a.”
- 11. Fix noun construction Original: has a great importance Suggested revision: is of great importance Why it matters: The fixed construction is “be of great importance.”
- 12. Correct the collocation Original: an explicit future Suggested revision: a clear future Why it matters: “Explicit” describes something directly stated, so it does not naturally modify “future” here.
Suggested Rewrites
- prominent roles an important role
- taking making
- followed by the consequences and discuss the consequences
- in terms of understanding of our modern world problems in terms of understanding problems in the modern world
- socials social
- in all the ages throughout history
Why this response received Band 6.0
The response explains the value of historical study with a clear central idea and several relevant references to recurring conflicts and the rise and fall of civilizations. However, the second required question is answered only through vague claims about tragic social consequences, so the task is unevenly developed. The priority is to explain specific effects on children or society and support each one with a clear causal example.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
The importance of history is developed adequately, but the effects of not teaching it are asserted rather than explained.
Develop two specific consequences for children or society and show clearly how a lack of historical knowledge causes them.
Coherence and Cohesion
The paragraph sequence is recognizable and the main argument progresses, although repetition and faulty sentence linking weaken flow.
Give the consequences paragraph a clear controlling idea and connect each supporting sentence directly to it.
Lexical Resource
The response shows sufficient range for the topic, but recurrent imprecise and unnatural word combinations limit clarity.
Replace expressions such as explicit future and effects of the children with conventional, exact wording.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A mix of simple and complex forms conveys the message, though article, agreement, punctuation, and sentence-boundary errors recur.
Revise run-on sentences and fragments, then check articles and noun forms systematically.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
To some people studying the past has little value in the modern world. Why do you think it is important to learn the past? What will be the effect if children are not taught history?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.