You have decided to give several hours of your time each month to improve the community where you live. What is one thing you will do to improve your community? Why? Use specific reasons and details to explain your choice.
Sample Response
Historically, humansHistorically humans have dwelled in communities, which set them aparta community which sets them apart from the other species on Earthearth. Communities have existed in different forms and can be the foundation of any developed civilisationepicentre for any grown civilisation. Any community is made up of individuals who contribute towards the growth and well-being of the overall community. Since I am an integral part of my community, I equally share responsibility for my communityshare the ownership and duty towards my community. I have decided to spend a few hoursspend few hours every month to contribute to building a fitness facilitytowards building up fitness facility in my community. I consider fitness‘Fitness’ as a very important aspect of an individual’s life. It is not a high prioritydoesn’t have a very high priority in our day-to-day life due to our busy work schedulesschedule and thus it always takes a back seat in terms of our daily routineitinerary. To quote the famous saying, “A healthy mind in a healthy body”, exercising is the best way to keep our body and mind healthy. Besides keeping us healthy, we can add variety to our daily routinebring freshness into our daily routine by exercising every day. Having fitness equipment in the community just a few footsteps away can be highly motivatingcan have very motivating results. People can exercise at their convenience without spending unnecessary time commutingon the commute. Another reason to set up fitness equipment in the community is affordabilityis the affordability. Not every family can afford gymsthe Gyms and fitness centres. Since these commercial fitness centres charge high feescharge a lot of fees, fitness at times is perceived as a luxury commodity, thus depriving peopledepriving the people of the best of the class equipment. But, in this world of technology, world-class well-designed equipment is availableequipment with the best design are available at low prices too. To give an example, Singapore government has deployed fitness equipment at every 100 meters for their Housing Development Board Units. Thus, the success of Singapore can be repeated in my society. To conclude, I consider fitness as a daily need and not a once in a blue moon activity. Having fitness in a community is the best way to push ourselves to the treadmill every day. I recommend having fitness in the community to enjoy the benefits of a healthy body.
Why this response received Band 6.5
The response gives a clear, relevant proposal and supports it with several connected reasons, particularly accessibility, affordability, and health benefits. Its main limitation is that the ideas are presented as one long block and sometimes become repetitive or awkwardly expressed. The highest-priority improvement is to organise the argument into purposeful paragraphs while explaining more concretely how the writer would help establish the facility.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
The chosen community fitness facility directly answers both questions and is supported with several relevant reasons and an example.
Explain the writer's specific contribution to creating the facility so the proposed action is as fully developed as its benefits.
Coherence and Cohesion
Ideas progress logically from health to convenience and affordability, but the entire response is presented as one long paragraph.
Divide the response into a concise introduction, focused body paragraphs, and a conclusion, with each paragraph developing one main reason.
Lexical Resource
The response uses a good range of topic vocabulary, though repetition of fitness and several awkward collocations reduce precision.
Use more natural combinations such as community gym, affordable access, and exercise facilities while avoiding unnecessary repetition and capitalization.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A range of complex structures communicates the argument clearly, despite recurring article, agreement, and noun-form errors.
Check countable nouns and subject-verb agreement, especially in phrases such as a few hours, a fitness facility, and equipment is available.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
You have decided to give several hours of your time each month to improve the community where you live. What is one thing you will do to improve your community? Why? Use specific reasons and details to explain your choice.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.