Some people believe that it is the responsibility of individuals to take care of their own health and diet. Others however believe that governments should make sure that their citizens have a healthy diet. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
Sample Response
Nowadays, an increasingNowadays an increasing number of people are becoming concerned about their health and the quality of their diet. There are two opposing viewsdiametrically opposed opinions on the matter. Some people believe that each individualeach and every individual is responsible for their own health while others state that it is the government that must ensure that the citizens have healthy eating habits.
Personally, I believe that people bear full responsibility for their diets for a number of reasons. First, nowadays there is a widevast variety of products that everyone can choose from, ensuring a balanced diet consisting of different types of foodproducts with sufficient vitamins, proteins, carbohydrates and fats. Everyone can balance their diets based on these factors andaccording to these factors and also based on their taste preferences. For example vegetarians will prefer beans rich in protein while omnivorous eaters might opt for meat instead. Secondly, while governments cannot vary considerablygovernments cannot considerably vary in their healthy-eating programmes, which usually adherein their healthy eating programs usually adhering to 'one size fits all' approach, individuals know exactly what they need in order to keep fit and healthy both generally and with respect to dietboth generally speaking and in terms of food. We take a tailored approachWe take tailored approach as we know exactly what we need to succeed in life, be strong and healthy.
However, others argue that the government is fully responsible for the kind of food its population consumesconsume because they make decisions regarding the quality of food their country produces and importsfood their country produce and import as well as prices. For instance, in many developing countries people rarely have access to high quality food, thus being forced to choose cheaper options such as fast foodsomething cheap like fast food. Moreover, the government can introduce legislation regardingas regards to what kind of food can be promoted, seen for example in many European countries where the advertising of fast food, alcohol and cigarettes is prohibited. These measuresmeasure, it is argued, can affect the way we eat and influencecontrol the diets of the whole population.
In conclusion, while the governments may play a role in the choice of food of its citizens, it is still the responsibility of every individual whether to eat healthy diet or not due to many reasons being that a variety of methods to balance their diets or their finances. After all our life is in our hands!
Why this response received Band 7.5
The essay addresses both perspectives, sustains a clear personal view, and develops its discussion through relevant examples and a logical four-paragraph structure. Its main limitation is recurring grammatical and collocational awkwardness, particularly in agreement, articles, and the final sentence, which occasionally blurs otherwise strong ideas. The highest-priority improvement is a careful language edit that makes complex sentences more precise and idiomatic.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
Both views and the writer's opinion are fully addressed with relevant reasoning, though a few claims are generalized or only briefly justified.
Qualify broad claims about government programmes and individual knowledge, and explain the limits of each position more precisely.
Coherence and Cohesion
The essay progresses logically through clearly focused paragraphs, with generally effective cohesive devices and referencing.
Tighten a few long sentences and make the transition into the conclusion more concise to preserve the strong progression.
Lexical Resource
A broad and flexible vocabulary supports nuanced discussion, although several collocations and expressions sound awkward or imprecise.
Replace phrases such as 'take tailored approach' and 'as regards to' with precise, idiomatic alternatives.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Complex structures are used frequently and meaning remains clear, but article, agreement, and number errors recur across the response.
Check determiners and subject-verb agreement carefully, especially with collective nouns, singular governments, and plural demonstratives.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Some people believe that it is the responsibility of individuals to take care of their own health and diet. Others however believe that governments should make sure that their citizens have a healthy diet. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.