Some people think that we should invent a new language for international communication. Will the benefits of this outweigh the problems associated with it?
Same question Compare 2 different answersSample Response
Today, English is regarded as an international language to communicate between different nationalities all around the world. However, some people insist that a new international language should be introduced to enhance more effective interaction and communication among people. I believe that it is a great idea to bring the world on one platform and this action will have more advantages than disadvantages.
To commence with the demerits of it - if the world has a single dominant language, it may affect negatively the cultural identity of some countries. Many languages will go instinct as everyone will be eager to learn a new international language to cope with the pace of life. Regardless of their mother language, the new language will become their priority to have higher education and better jobs. In addition, this would also increase the expenditure of the state as creating, publishing and teaching this new language will require extra funds from the government.
On the other hand, there are some concrete advantages of it. Trading among the countries will be easier without a language barrier, which will increase the economic progress of all nations. Also, this process will make it convenient for every individual to travel around the world without any communication barrier, and due to this new international language, individuals will have equal opportunities in job sectors, which will provide higher standards of living and result in increased paid taxes. Finally, it is not that easy for non-native people to learn English perfectly as it requires time and experience. The accent is another problem for people in non-English-speaking countries. If a new international language is introduced, the accent would no longer be a problem for many people.
In conclusion, introducing a new global language will eliminate communication barriers, and allow people to have equal job opportunities. This will offer substantial benefits that would outweigh the demerits associated with a new global language.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Clarify the language's purpose Original: language to communicate between different nationalities Suggested revision: language for communication among different nationalities Why it matters: “For communication among” is the natural construction when more than two groups are involved.
- 2. Correct the verb choice Original: enhance Suggested revision: enable Why it matters: A new language can enable interaction, while “enhance more effective” is an illogical combination.
- 3. Avoid overlapping terms Original: interaction and communication Suggested revision: communication Why it matters: “Interaction” and “communication” overlap here, so one precise noun is sufficient.
- 4. Use a natural expression Original: bring the world on one platform Suggested revision: bring the world together Why it matters: “Bring the world together” naturally expresses the intended idea of unity.
- 5. Improve the transition Original: To commence with the demerits of it - Suggested revision: To begin with its disadvantages, Why it matters: The revision uses a natural transition, clear pronoun reference, and standard punctuation.
- 6. Place the adverb correctly Original: it may affect negatively the cultural identity Suggested revision: it may negatively affect the cultural identity Why it matters: The adverb should precede the verb it modifies.
- 7. Correct the word choice Original: go instinct Suggested revision: become extinct Why it matters: “Extinct” describes a language that disappears, whereas “instinct” has an unrelated meaning.
- 8. Use the correct idiom Original: cope with the pace of life Suggested revision: keep pace with life Why it matters: The intended idiom is “keep pace with,” meaning to remain current with change.
- 9. Use the standard term Original: language Suggested revision: tongue Why it matters: “Mother tongue” is the conventional expression for a person's first language.
- 10. Clarify the purpose Original: priority to have higher education Suggested revision: priority for accessing higher education Why it matters: The revised phrase uses the correct preposition and states what learning the language would enable.
- 11. Use concise wording Original: increase the expenditure of the state Suggested revision: increase state expenditure Why it matters: The attributive noun phrase conveys the same meaning more directly.
- 12. Use concise funding language Original: extra funds from the government Suggested revision: additional government funding Why it matters: The replacement is more concise and natural in a discussion of public expenditure.
Suggested Rewrites
- language to communicate between different nationalities language for communication among different nationalities
- enhance enable
- interaction and communication communication
- bring the world on one platform bring the world together
- To commence with the demerits of it - To begin with its disadvantages,
- it may affect negatively the cultural identity it may negatively affect the cultural identity
Why this response received Band 7.0
The response clearly weighs both sides and sustains a consistent view that the benefits would prevail, with practical discussion of trade, travel, employment, cultural identity, and public cost. Its main limitation is that several advantages are asserted without explaining why an invented language would create them more effectively than an existing shared language, and some awkward word choices reduce accuracy. The highest-priority improvement is to strengthen that comparison with precise causal reasoning.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
The response addresses both benefits and problems and gives a clear overall judgement, but some key benefits are insufficiently justified in relation to inventing a new language.
Explain why a newly created language, rather than an established common language, would specifically produce the claimed advantages.
Coherence and Cohesion
The argument follows a clear problem-to-benefit structure with effective paragraphing, though some transitions are mechanical and one long sentence carries too many ideas.
Break the extended benefits discussion into more controlled units and use links that show the precise relationship between claims.
Lexical Resource
There is sufficient range for the topic, but several inaccurate or unnatural choices, including “go instinct” and “increased paid taxes,” weaken precision.
Check collocations and word forms carefully, especially when expressing extinction, government revenue, and employment opportunities.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Complex sentences are used with generally good control, although errors in word order, articles, prepositions, and punctuation occur intermittently.
Edit complex clauses for natural adverb placement and accurate article and preposition use, while avoiding unnecessary comma breaks.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Some people think that we should invent a new language for international communication. Will the benefits of this outweigh the problems associated with it?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.