It is often stated that newspapers have a great influence in our opinions and ideas. Does this influence have more positive or negative outcome?
Sample Response
The newspaper is one of the cheapest forms of the communication system which connects a large number of people. Newspaper plays and important role in the lives of the people, newspapers bring out the news and the happenings which are unknown to a large section of masses. The reason for the influence are as under newspaper affects the minds of the voter and influences them in a large scale, the voter has an independent decisive mind which nurtures by reading and knowing of all news prevailing around him.
People are even influenced by their selective opinions; many are influenced by the advertisements popping out in the newspapers. They even impact the lives and thinking abilities of the students, they have an opportunity to undergo and acclaim large volume of academic knowledge which is published in the newspapers.
Newspapers even influence the unemployed by connecting them with the employers not only in their area but also abroad. Newspapers play a significant role in the lives of the people. They do have options to opt the best with the glimpse of the same in the newspapers. Newspapers inculcate creative ideas to its readers by way of their lifestyle editions. They get to know the lifestyles of different people in different areas.
Apart from the above, readers can know a wide variety of incidents happening around the world which often nurture their thinking and lifestyles. The main impact of newspapers is that people have the choice to get themselves updated with the latest around them and they can generate some sort of defensive methodology in the case of need when under influenced by serious incidents like robbery, theft etc.
Newspapers in the recent past have definitely impacted the generation, not all are of positive in nature but there are situations where a riot atmosphere developed due to the prevailing news in the papers. Definitely, there are positive and negative aspects of the newspapers but the impact on people can be controlled by reserving the right on the printed matter.
An independent authority can be bestowed the responsibility of justifying the impact of the news and decide its influence before publishing.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Article and noun form Original: one of the cheapest forms of the communication system Suggested revision: one of the cheapest forms of communication Why it matters: The phrase is more natural without the communication system.
- 2. Article error Original: plays and important role Suggested revision: plays an important role Why it matters: An is needed before important.
- 3. Run-on sentence Original: newspapers bring out the news Suggested revision: Newspapers bring out the news Why it matters: This should begin a new sentence after the previous complete thought.
- 4. Natural phrase Original: a large section of masses Suggested revision: a large section of the public Why it matters: Masses is awkward in this phrase.
- 5. Unclear structure Original: The reason for the influence are as under Suggested revision: The reasons for this influence are as follows Why it matters: The subject-verb agreement and phrase are incorrect.
- 6. Preposition Original: in a large scale Suggested revision: on a large scale Why it matters: On a large scale is the correct collocation.
- 7. Passive missing Original: which nurtures by reading Suggested revision: which is nurtured by reading Why it matters: The passive verb needs is nurtured.
- 8. Formal wording Original: advertisements popping out Suggested revision: advertisements appearing Why it matters: Popping out is too informal for this essay.
- 9. Wrong verb Original: acclaim large volume Suggested revision: gain a large volume Why it matters: Acclaim does not fit this meaning.
- 10. Unclear phrase Original: opt the best with the glimpse of the same Suggested revision: choose better opportunities after seeing them Why it matters: The original phrase is difficult to understand.
- 11. Unnatural phrase Original: defensive methodology Suggested revision: protective response Why it matters: Defensive methodology is not natural in this context.
- 12. Word form Original: not all are of positive in nature Suggested revision: not all of them are positive in nature Why it matters: The phrase needs a clearer subject and adjective form.
Suggested Rewrites
- one of the cheapest forms of the communication system one of the cheapest forms of communication
- plays and important role plays an important role
- newspapers bring out the news Newspapers bring out the news
- a large section of masses a large section of the public
- The reason for the influence are as under The reasons for this influence are as follows
- in a large scale on a large scale
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Detailed feedback by IELTS writing criterion after the annotated essay.
Task Response
The essay discusses several ways newspapers influence readers, but the required judgement about whether the influence is more positive or negative is delayed and underdeveloped. Many points are descriptive rather than evaluative.
State a clear position in the introduction and organise the essay around positive and negative outcomes, with a final comparison.
Coherence and Cohesion
There are paragraph breaks, but progression is weak because ideas repeat and several sentences are loosely connected. The essay lacks clear topic sentences and a controlled argument path.
Use one paragraph for positive influence and one for negative influence, then add a conclusion that weighs them.
Lexical Resource
Vocabulary is adequate for basic communication, but there are many unnatural collocations and repeated words such as influence, newspaper, people, and impact. Some phrases are hard to interpret.
Replace vague or unnatural phrases with precise topic language such as public opinion, misinformation, civic awareness, and advertising pressure.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Frequent sentence-boundary, agreement, article, and word-form errors reduce clarity. Several long sentences contain multiple clauses joined incorrectly.
Write shorter sentences and check that each clause has a clear subject and verb.