Some people think that public health within a country can be improved by government making laws regarding nutritious food. Others, however, think that health is a matter of personal choice and responsibility. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
Sample Response
Personal and public health are tightly related to food choices. While some people believe that the government should regulate nutrition to improve public healthwellness, others argue that people should decide whether to pursue a healthy dietit should be people’s decision whether to pursue a healthy diet or not. This essay will discuss both points of view and explain why the authorities should not control the types of food people can buy.
Legislators could impose laws concerning nutritious food to improve population healthin an effort to have a healthier population, therebytherefore, decreasing public health costs. Even if this could be considered a good idea, it would be very difficultvery quite difficult to implement. To achieve this target, the governmentrulers could impose a levy on unhealthy foodsunhealthy food options, or reduce their availability on the grocery stores shelves. In Italy, for example, products such as carbonated sugary drinks and chips are heavily taxed. As a result, the sales of these items have decreased. However, if the authorities start to take control of what their citizens can or cannot eat, it may be seen as a limitation on freedomas limitation of freedom.
Since personal freedom is an extremely important human right, many people think that they should be responsible for their choices regarding the food and drinks they consumefood and drinks they decide to consume. I agree with this opinion because limiting nutritional options, even if it is done with the best intentionsoutcome in mind, could consequently create dissatisfaction among the population, which would possibly lead to other public issues such as protests and demonstrations. A better approach could be to educatecould be educating the public about a healthy diet, which would help people make better-informed decisions about the food they consume. Many developed countries around the world employed this strategy and saw public health gains.
In conclusion, even though the government is able to control the dietary habits of its population through taxation and restrictions, healthier citizens and reduced public health expenses are notexpenses isn’t the only possible outcome. Limiting personal freedom could result in social unrest and for that reason diet decisions are better to be left up to well-informed individuals.
Why this response received Band 8.0
The response is strongest in its balanced, well-developed discussion and consistently clear position, supported by relevant policy examples and an effective alternative approach. Its main limitation is a small cluster of grammatical and collocational slips that occasionally reduce polish. The highest-priority improvement is to proofread complex sentences for agreement, article use, and redundant modifiers while preserving the essay's strong reasoning and progression.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
Both views are explored directly, the writer's opinion is clear throughout, and the main ideas are well supported.
Make the evidence even more rigorous by qualifying broad claims about national policies and their health outcomes.
Coherence and Cohesion
Paragraphing and progression are highly logical, with cohesive devices guiding the discussion without obscuring the argument.
Tighten a few long cause-and-effect sentences so each logical relationship is expressed with maximum precision.
Lexical Resource
The response uses a wide and generally precise range of vocabulary for policy, health, and personal freedom.
Refine occasional word choices such as rulers and best outcome to maintain a consistently natural academic register.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Varied complex structures are handled well overall, but several noticeable errors prevent fully consistent accuracy.
Proofread for redundant modifiers, missing articles, possessive forms, and subject-verb agreement in complex sentences.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Some people think that public health within a country can be improved by government making laws regarding nutritious food. Others, however, think that health is a matter of personal choice and responsibility. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.