Buying things on the internet, such as books, air tickets, and groceries, is becoming more and more popular. Do the advantages of shopping in this way outweigh the disadvantages?
Sample Response
Now – a- days, the popularity of online shopping is growing faster because human beings feel it is very fruitful for them. according to my point of view, there are many pros such as cheap artifacts, convenient service, and few cons as well like late delivery. I will elaborate it in the following paragraphs.
The first advantage is big convenient to purchase a product on online shopping websites. All the persons can buy everything by using a computer and mobile phones while sitting just at their home. the shopping websites deliver purchased material to the house. as a result of it, mankind doesn’t have to waste their precious time to commute the shopping plaza.
Secondly, buying items on the internet is cost – effective. for instance, if one person will purchase cheaper goods online websites, then he can save money from this. so, he can expend his saved money on other expenditures.
There is some drawback also firstly and foremost, there is a huge chance when we are using credit cards during internet shopping. at that time we share our credit card information with a company to paying the cost of purchased stock through credit cards and debit cards. then any wrong party can hack it or steal our money. next disadvantage is the poor quality of a product. for instance, if someone purchase products on the internet, that material can be of bad quality because before buying the stock, we have no idea or information about bought things.
To Conclude, online shopping is very fruitful, time – saving and cheaper to buy various commodities easily. but it is rightly said that all the glitter is not gold. In other words, some poor websites provide bad communicates to show brilliant look on the home page of a website.
Buying things on the internet, such as books, air tickets, and groceries, is becoming more and more popular. Buying things on the internet, such as books, air tickets, and groceries Buying things on the internet, such as books, air tickets, and groceries Buying things on the internet, such as books, air tickets, and groceries
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Use precise growth term Original: faster Suggested revision: rapidly Why it matters: The comparative form lacks a stated point of comparison.
- 2. Use natural phrasing Original: feel it is very fruitful for them Suggested revision: find it very beneficial Why it matters: This collocation expresses the intended benefit more naturally.
- 3. Correct opinion phrase Original: according to my point of view Suggested revision: in my view Why it matters: The original expression combines two incompatible opinion phrases.
- 4. Choose accurate noun Original: cheap artifacts Suggested revision: inexpensive products Why it matters: Artifacts does not naturally refer to ordinary goods bought online.
- 5. Fix example structure Original: few cons as well like Suggested revision: a few disadvantages, such as Why it matters: A determiner and the standard example marker are required here.
- 6. Add required preposition Original: elaborate it Suggested revision: elaborate on this Why it matters: Elaborate requires on before its object in this construction.
- 7. Correct adjective phrase Original: big Suggested revision: very Why it matters: Big cannot modify the adjective convenient in this structure.
- 8. Use natural subject Original: All the persons Suggested revision: People Why it matters: People is the natural general plural noun in this context.
- 9. Simplify location phrase Original: sitting just at their home Suggested revision: sitting at home Why it matters: The original wording is unnecessarily awkward and idiomatically inaccurate.
- 10. Use accurate noun Original: material Suggested revision: goods Why it matters: Goods is the appropriate term for items bought from a retailer.
- 11. Fix verb pattern Original: commute the shopping plaza Suggested revision: travel to the shopping plaza Why it matters: Commute cannot take the destination directly as its object.
- 12. Avoid awkward repetition Original: expend his saved money on other expenditures Suggested revision: spend his savings on other expenses Why it matters: The revision uses natural verbs and avoids repeating forms of expenditure.
Suggested Rewrites
- faster rapidly
- feel it is very fruitful for them find it very beneficial
- according to my point of view in my view
- cheap artifacts inexpensive products
- few cons as well like a few disadvantages, such as
- elaborate it elaborate on this
Why this response received Band 5.0
The response identifies several relevant advantages and disadvantages, and its paragraph structure makes the intended line of discussion broadly recognizable. However, the comparative position is only implied, development remains thin, and the copied prompt at the end adds no credit while weakening the finish. The priority is to state clearly why one side outweighs the other and support that judgment with precise explanations in consistently accurate sentences.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
Relevant advantages and disadvantages are identified, but the outweigh judgment is only implied and the supporting ideas remain basic.
State a direct comparative position and explain why the chosen benefits or drawbacks carry greater weight.
Coherence and Cohesion
Paragraphing separates the main points, though progression is mechanical and the repeated task wording creates an irrelevant ending.
Use clear topic-led paragraphs and finish with a concise conclusion instead of copied prompt material.
Lexical Resource
The response has enough vocabulary to discuss the topic, but frequent inaccurate collocations and word choices reduce precision.
Prefer familiar, accurate phrases such as online purchases, home delivery, and financial fraud over unsuitable substitutes.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A mix of sentence forms is attempted, but frequent errors in articles, agreement, capitalization, and clause construction weaken control.
Build shorter complete sentences first, checking subject-verb agreement, articles, and sentence-initial capitalization throughout.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Buying things on the internet, such as books, air tickets, and groceries, is becoming more and more popular. Do the advantages of shopping in this way outweigh the disadvantages?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.