Organized tour to remote areas and community is increasingly popular. Is it a positive or negative development for the local people and the environment?
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Sample Response
In recent years, there has been a growing trendtendency for tourists to travel to remote locations and communities on organised tours. This has some positive effects on local peoplepositive impacts on the local people, but I think the detrimental effects on the environment are more significant and that the trend is negative overallthe issue is more of a negative development.
The financial and sociocultural benefits for local peopleThe financial and socio-cultural benefits for the locals in remote areas are evident. Tourists visiting these regions have a high demand for goods and services, and are mostly willing to pay higher than average prices. This helps to boost local economies in remote areas and eventually raise the living standards of local peopleenhance living standards of the local people. Regarding the socio-cultural aspects, Travelers from different cultures can provide ethnic people in remote areas, who are almost completely isolated from the outside world, with a lot of experiences through their interactions with one another, which can help these local residents to broaden knowledge about a more civilized society.
However, large numbers of touriststhe hordes of tourists to remote regions still haveleave severe impacts on the environment in these areas. In fact, tourists often litter whereverwhere ever they go and do not bother to clean up after themselvesclean after themselves in areas they have visited. This may lead to problems such as littered roadssuch conditions as dirty roads or clogged sewage systems in these places, which directly and negatively affectwhich negatively and directly affects local people’s living conditions. More indirectlyIn terms of indirect effects, I believe that the indigenous people may deplete their natural resourceshave to sacrifice their natural resources to accommodate tourists’ substantialinsatiable demands. In several mountainous areas of Vietnam, local people cut down vast areas of forest to make handicrafts or furniture for tourists. These activities can contribute to environmental degradationThese acts can contribute to the environmental deterioration in remote areas.
In conclusion, though local economies and communities in remote areasthe economy and societies in remote areas can benefit tremendously from organised tourism, I think that the negative environmental consequences that this situation brings are far more significant.
Why this response received Band 7.0
The response gives a clear judgement and develops relevant economic, social, and environmental consequences with a concrete example from Vietnam. Its main limitation is uneven language control: awkward collocations and a few overloaded sentences reduce precision despite the strong vocabulary range. The highest-priority improvement is to express each causal link in shorter, more natural sentences and check agreement carefully.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
The essay directly answers the question with a consistent negative judgement while examining benefits for residents and harm to the environment.
Develop the final weighing more explicitly by explaining why the environmental damage outweighs the economic and social gains.
Coherence and Cohesion
The response follows a clear paragraph structure and logical contrast, although some long sentences contain too many linked ideas.
Break the socio-cultural discussion into shorter units so each claim, explanation, and consequence has a clearer progression.
Lexical Resource
Vocabulary is varied and topic-appropriate, but recurring awkward combinations such as leave severe impacts and provide people with experiences limit precision.
Build control of common cause-and-effect collocations, including have an impact, gain experience, and meet tourist demand.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
The essay uses varied complex structures successfully, but agreement, punctuation, capitalisation, and sentence-boundary errors recur.
Check subject-verb agreement and divide heavily embedded relative-clause sentences to improve grammatical accuracy and control.