In the past, people used to travel to see the differences from their home country. However, the sceneries in places around the world seem similar nowadays. What are the causes of these similarities? Do you think that the advantages of these similarities outweigh the disadvantages?
Sample Response
Global tourism is enjoying a surge in popularityan upsurge in popularity nowadays. However, this trend is accompanied by many complaints that similarities among landscapessimilarities of the landscapes considerably reduce the appeal of travelreduce the delights and attractions of travel. Globalisation, in my viewmind, is the main causethe greatest reason of these similaritiesfor the similarities. I also think that it has more disadvantages than benefits. UndoubtedlyNo doubt, globalisation unifies the world in many respectsin many different aspects. Girls in Shanghai can be witnessed to have the same street look as those in Paris and Milan; KFC and Pizza Hut are popular in Bangkok as they are back in California; the amazing film "2012" was premiered internationally at the same moment. Tourist attractions cannot escape this sweeping trendescape from this sweeping trend. Therefore, it is quite normal to hear comments from a tourist in Hong Kong, claiming that what he or she has seen is just the same as in Tokyo. This phenomenon, to me, is depressinga depressing one despite a few minor benefits that it might offer. People may have sacrificed too much of their cultural identitysacrificed too many of their cultural identities because of this trendfor this. Culture is our ancestors' most treasuredtreasurable heritage that is supposed to be passed on from generation to generation. It would be disastrous if people could only recall busy shopping streetsthose busy shopping streets instead of the traditional lanes and houses after their trip to Vietnam. I rememberAnd I remember how frustrated I was when I found many common souvenirsa lot of popular souvenirs in some foreign countries that could also be bought in Ho Chi Minh Citycould be bought back in Ho Chi Minh City — those delicate wooden sculptures really seemed far less appealing to me. To conclude, since the trend of globalisation is inevitable, I suggest that both the government and the public make joint efforts to protect and preservemake joint efforts in protecting and preserving their unique cultural features. Otherwise, global tourism will eventually becomewould eventually turn out to be boring and pointless.
Why this response received Band 6.5
The response clearly identifies globalisation as the cause of growing similarity and gives vivid examples of standardised clothing, food, media, attractions, and souvenirs. Its major limitation is that it claims disadvantages outweigh benefits without explaining any actual advantage, so the comparison is incomplete; the single-block structure also weakens organisation. The highest priority is to develop at least one concrete benefit and weigh it explicitly against cultural loss before restating the verdict.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
The cause and disadvantages are developed clearly, but the advantages are only mentioned and never explained despite the required comparison.
Develop a specific advantage, such as familiarity or convenience for travellers, and show explicitly why cultural loss is more significant.
Coherence and Cohesion
The reasoning moves understandably from globalisation to cultural loss and a recommendation, but the entire essay is presented as one block.
Use separate paragraphs for the cause, advantages, disadvantages, and conclusion, with a clear comparison linking the two sides.
Lexical Resource
The response uses varied vocabulary and vivid examples, though several expressions are awkward or imprecise.
Replace phrases such as 'the delights and attractions of travel', 'same street look', and 'most treasurable heritage' with natural alternatives.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Complex sentence forms are frequent and generally accurate, with occasional awkward passive constructions and prepositional choices.
Prefer direct structures such as 'girls in Shanghai may dress like girls in Paris' and proofread articles and relative clauses.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
In the past, people used to travel to see the differences from their home country. However, the sceneries in places around the world seem similar nowadays. What are the causes of these similarities? Do you think that the advantages of these similarities outweigh the disadvantages?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.