Some countries invest a significant amount of money in promoting the use of bicycles. Why do you think this is the case? Does it have a positive or a negative impact on individuals and the society?
This response is estimated at Band 8.0. Can you write a better one?
Write yours and get clear feedback on all four criteria.
- Closest to official scores
- What to fix on each criterion
- Feedback in about 20 seconds · free
Sample Response
Some countries invest substantial sumssignificant amounts of money in promoting the use of bicycles. This essay will argue that governments do so primarily for health and environmental reasons, and that promoting cycling has an overall positive impactthis trend has an overall positive impact on both individuals and society.
Governments promote cycling because of the health and environmental benefits cyclingit offers. From a public health perspective, more frequent cyclinghigher rates of cycling can reduce the prevalence of lifestyle-related diseases such as diabetes, thereby lowering the burden on national healthcare systems. From an environmental standpoint, private vehicle use remains one of the leading sourcesprivate vehicles remain one of the leading sources of urban air pollution and greenhouse gas emissions, and governments under pressure to meet international climate targets view promoting cycling as an effective measureview cycling promotion as an effective measure. Since many people are willing to cyclealready willing to cycle but are deterred by safety concerns or inadequate infrastructure, such as a shortage of secure bicycle parking, governments believe that addressing these barriers is a worthwhile investment.
When cycling becomes more widespread, tangible benefits emergemeaningful changes occur at both the individual and societal levels. For individuals, cycling can improve quality of lifequality of life improves as cycling becomes a practical way to incorporate regular exercise into a busy routinea busy daily routine. It also helps reduce stress and improve mental well-being. At the societal level, cycling can revitalise local communities. Unlike car travel, cycling encourages people to travel at a slower pacecycling encourages people to slow down and engage with their surroundings, making them more likely to stop at local shops and cafes, thereby boosting local economic activity. Furthermore, investment in dedicated cycling lanes and shared bicycle schemes makes urban environments safer and more pleasant for all residents.
In conclusion, governments invest in cycling promotion for health and environmental reasons, and when these efforts succeed, the benefits extend to individuals and local communities alike. I therefore consider this trend to be a positive development.
Why this response received Band 8.0
The response is strongest in its direct, well-organised treatment of both the reasons for government investment and the benefits for individuals and society, supported by fluent and precise language. Its main limitation is that several societal claims, particularly about local economies and safer urban environments, remain somewhat general; adding one more concrete causal explanation or example would make the argument more fully developed.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
Both questions are answered directly with a clear positive position and relevant, well-developed reasons and effects.
Develop one societal benefit with a more specific example or a fuller explanation of the causal link.
Coherence and Cohesion
Ideas progress logically through well-focused paragraphs, and cohesive devices connect points smoothly without becoming conspicuous.
Strengthen the transition between the reasons for investment and the resulting impacts by making their relationship more explicit.
Lexical Resource
A wide and precise vocabulary supports nuanced discussion of health, environmental, economic, and infrastructure issues.
Refine a few broad expressions such as meaningful changes by choosing wording that states the exact effect immediately.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A wide range of complex structures is used accurately, with strong control of clauses, punctuation, and agreement.
Maintain this accuracy while varying sentence openings slightly more to give the prose an even more natural rhythm.