The only way to improve the safety of our roads is to give much stricter punishments on driving offencesoffenses. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Sample Response
Some individuals believe that the only effective way to improve road safety is to impose far harsher penalties for driving offencesmuch stricter punishments for driving offences. I firmly disagree with this statement because although tough penalties can help reduce dangerous drivinglower dangerous behaviour, they are not the only solution or the most comprehensive oneonly or most comprehensive solution.
To begin with, strict punishments such as heavyhuge fines, licence suspensionsdismissals, or even imprisonment can effectively detersurely discourage drivers from committing serious offences like drunk driving or speeding. When driversthe citizens of a country know that violating traffic laws will result inwill lead them to face severe consequences, they are more likely to drive responsiblymost likely to behave responsibly. For instance, in most countries, stricter drink-driving laws have contributed to a noticeable reduction in road accidentson-road accidents.
However, relying only on harsher penalties overlooks other important factors that influence road safety. Many accidentsMany of the accidents occur due to the poor road conditionsdamage on the roads, inadequateless lighting at night, or unclear road signsunclear signboards. Improving the infrastructure of a city can greatly help its citizens avoid accidents. Moreover, investing in driver’s education is another useful measureis also a suggestion since the government can address common mistakesthe common mistakes that occur due to inexperience or misunderstandings of traffic rulesthe misunderstanding of traffic rules.
To conclude, although stricter punishments can play a crucial role in directly promoting safer driving, they are also far from the only method available. A proper and well-balanced approach that combines law enforcement, proper education, and a better road infrastructure is even more effective in ensuring long-term road safety for everyone.
Why this response received Band 7.0
The essay maintains a clear disagreement throughout and presents a well-balanced explanation of why penalties should be combined with infrastructure and education. The main weakness is that support remains somewhat general and the response falls slightly below the expected length, while several awkward word choices reduce precision. Develop one alternative measure in greater depth and revise collocations so the argument sounds more exact and natural.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
A clear position is sustained, and the response addresses both the value of punishment and the importance of alternative measures with relevant support.
Extend the explanation of how education or infrastructure prevents accidents and support it with a more specific example while meeting the minimum length.
Coherence and Cohesion
Ideas are logically sequenced in well-focused paragraphs, and cohesive devices clearly guide the contrast between punishment and other measures.
Strengthen progression within the third paragraph by explaining each alternative fully before moving to the next one.
Lexical Resource
The vocabulary range is adequate for the topic, but several imprecise collocations such as licence dismissals, less lighting, and driver's education reduce naturalness.
Use established expressions such as licence suspension, inadequate lighting, and driver education, and avoid unnecessary repetition of proper.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
The response uses a good range of simple and complex structures with generally accurate control and clear meaning throughout.
Polish article, possessive, and comparison choices in phrases such as many of the accidents, driver's education, and most likely to behave.
Write this task while it is fresh
Try the same task now. It helps you remember the feedback and write better next time.
IELTS Writing Task 2
The only way to improve the safety of our roads is to give much stricter punishments on driving offencesoffenses. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.