Many students find it difficult to focus or pay attention at school nowadays. What are the reasons for this? What can be done to solve this problem?
Sample Response
Over the past few decadesPast few decades, humankind has placedhumankind put more weight on education and health. Many peopleSeveral individuals believe that many studentsa host of learners find it difficult to concentrate at schoollearn at an educational institution. In this essay, I not only proposemitigate solutions, but I will also discuss the reasons for this problemdiscuss the reasons behind it, in the following paragraphs, along with a logical conclusion.
There are numerous reasons behind it. First and foremost, in this contemporary era, young people readily learn new thingsyouth adept new things easily. They more like to cherish life rather than study in addition, owing to own smartphone or computer, they play games and after some period addicted thus, find less attention during lectures. Secondly, we all know that in the internet agein this internet time, everything is available. The majority of pupils receiveget education from digital platforms where they learn through visual materialslearn it with visual effects.
To tackle this predicament, authorities, schools and parentsthe authority, schools and parents play a vital role. The school have to develop an environment where the student learns education without and burden, and the authority can forge a new educational system. In other words, e-learning in physics classes could bephysics class would be a better option which creates interest and helps pupils pay attentioncreates interest and pupils pay attention. Furthermore, the guardian ought to give some on children and monitor them such as only giving some hours for gaming types activities.
In conclusion, it’s true that young people are distractedyoung people distract by other stuff, the influence of Western culturewestern culture affluence and technological amenities arebecause of technological amenities are the main reasons, and schools and parents should tacklethe educational field and parents tackle this problem together and help them build successful careers and futuresaid to shine their career or future.
Why this response received Band 5.0
The response addresses both causes and solutions and uses a recognizable problem-solution structure, with practical references to classroom technology and parental monitoring. However, several ideas are only briefly or unclearly explained, while frequent inaccurate word choices and grammatical errors make many sentences difficult to follow. The main priority is to develop one clear cause and one matched solution in precise, controlled sentences.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
Both parts of the task are addressed, but the causes and solutions are unevenly explained and sometimes unclear.
Develop each main cause with a specific explanation, then show clearly how the proposed solution addresses it.
Coherence and Cohesion
The problem-solution paragraph structure is recognizable, although progression within sentences is often disrupted by faulty linking and run-on construction.
Use one controlling idea per paragraph and connect shorter sentences with simple, accurate cohesive devices.
Lexical Resource
The response attempts varied vocabulary, but frequent inappropriate word choices and collocations reduce precision and readability.
Prioritize accurate, natural combinations such as lose concentration, become addicted, and limit gaming time.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Some complex forms are attempted, but frequent errors in sentence structure, agreement, articles, and verb forms cause difficulty for the reader.
Build complete subject-verb sentences first and check agreement and verb forms before adding subordinate clauses.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Many students find it difficult to focus or pay attention at school nowadays. What are the reasons for this? What can be done to solve this problem?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.