Air traffic is increasingly leading to more noise, pollution, and airport construction. One reason for this is the growth in low-cost passenger flights, often to holiday destinations. Some people say that the government should try to reduce air traffic by taxing it more heavily. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?
Sample Response
Over the recent years, the popularity of air services has been in demand. Some people claim that air traffic causes inevitable pollution; others see the other side of the coin. I disagree that government bodies are obliged to decrease air traffic using taxation.
To begin with, if the state increases the taxes, it will significantly affect lower-class people. They will not travel as much as they did before because of the inability to afford tickets. In fact, many families with children will suffer. Some parents might have promised to take the child to popular resort ”Disney World” in the USA or to ski in the mountains in Eastern Europe, but will be forced to refuse them. In addition to this, taxing only lower-class people will emphasise the severity of other issues of these days- the inequalities between humans. It is undoubtedly imposing taxes only on several numbers of people is unfair. As a result it may make them feel humiliated and discontent with the air services.
Secondly, governments need to consider reexamining the approach to the eco-system. There is a variety of pollutions, for instance traffic from buses, cars and trains should be the primary concern. It is unreasonable to suggest that it is more common problem which requires more attention. Many cosmopolitan cities are more likely to get polluted from the above mentioned types of pollutions than air pollution. Moreover, it can lead to long-term effects on their health, especially on respiratory system.
One could draw the conclusion that the taxation should be equally distributed according to income levels among all classes of people. Governments ought to identify the problems related to traffic and select the appropriate ones to work on.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Use natural time phrase Original: Over the recent years Suggested revision: In recent years Why it matters: The standard expression for a recent period is 'in recent years'.
- 2. Use precise preposition Original: using Suggested revision: through Why it matters: 'Through taxation' more naturally expresses the means of reducing traffic.
- 3. Use tax collocation Original: increases the taxes Suggested revision: raises taxes Why it matters: Governments 'raise taxes' in standard English.
- 4. Use neutral wording Original: affect lower-class people Suggested revision: affect people on lower incomes Why it matters: This phrase conveys the economic distinction more precisely and neutrally.
- 5. Clarify the subject Original: because of the inability to afford tickets Suggested revision: because they would be unable to afford tickets Why it matters: The clause needs an explicit subject to show who cannot afford the tickets.
- 6. Match plural reference Original: take the child Suggested revision: take their children Why it matters: The plural subject 'parents' requires a matching plural possessive and noun.
- 7. Add article and quotes Original: to popular resort ”Disney World” Suggested revision: to the popular resort “Disney World” Why it matters: A singular countable noun needs an article, and the quotation marks should be paired correctly.
- 8. Correct the meaning Original: forced to refuse them Suggested revision: forced to break that promise Why it matters: Parents break a promise rather than refuse the children in this context.
- 9. Use neutral wording Original: taxing only lower-class people Suggested revision: taxing only people on lower incomes Why it matters: This wording identifies income status without an imprecise social label.
- 10. Improve clarity Original: issues of these days- the inequalities between humans Suggested revision: issues today—the inequality between social groups Why it matters: The revision uses natural phrasing and names the relevant form of inequality more clearly.
- 11. Clarify the reference Original: As a result it may Suggested revision: As a result, this may Why it matters: 'This' clearly refers to the proposed tax, while the comma marks the introductory linker.
- 12. Use natural collocation Original: discontent with the air services Suggested revision: dissatisfied with air travel Why it matters: 'Dissatisfied with air travel' is a more natural expression for this response.
Suggested Rewrites
- Over the recent years In recent years
- using through
- increases the taxes raises taxes
- affect lower-class people affect people on lower incomes
- because of the inability to afford tickets because they would be unable to afford tickets
- take the child take their children
Why this response received Band 5.5
The response presents a clear disagreement and organises two discernible reasons, with the concern about affordability receiving useful illustration. Its main limitation is that it assumes the tax would target poorer travellers and gives limited attention to the environmental case for reducing flights, while the conclusion partly shifts position. The priority is to develop a direct rebuttal to the proposed tax and maintain that position consistently throughout.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
A clear position is presented, but supporting ideas are unevenly developed and partly rest on the unsupported assumption that only poorer people would be taxed.
Address the proposed air-travel tax directly by weighing its environmental purpose against two fully explained objections.
Coherence and Cohesion
The response has a recognisable introduction, body progression, and conclusion, although some links between claims are unclear and the final position shifts.
Use each paragraph to advance one explicit reason that connects directly to the thesis, then restate the same position in the conclusion.
Lexical Resource
There is enough vocabulary to discuss taxation, inequality, transport, and health, but frequent awkward or inaccurate collocations reduce precision.
Replace imprecise phrases such as broad class labels and pluralised uncountable nouns with natural, topic-specific wording.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
The response attempts a range of sentence structures, but recurring article, agreement, punctuation, and clause-construction errors weaken control.
Proofread complex sentences for complete clause structure, correct articles, and clear pronoun reference before adding further complexity.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Air traffic is increasingly leading to more noise, pollution, and airport construction. One reason for this is the growth in low-cost passenger flights, often to holiday destinations. Some people say that the government should try to reduce air traffic by taxing it more heavily. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.