Advances in technology and automation have reduced the need for manual labour. Therefore working hours in offices and factories should be reduced. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?
Sample Response
AdvancesThe advancements in technology and automation have revolutionised industries across the globe, resulting in a significant reduction in the need for manual labour. Given this reductionIn light of this, I strongly agree that working hours in offices and factories should be reduced. This essay will outline the reasons for this viewreasons supporting this viewpoint.
One compelling reason to reduce working hours is to improveenhance work-life balance and promote the well-being of employees. Longer working hours can lead to physical and mental exhaustion, negatively impacting quality of lifethe overall quality of life. By reducing working hours, individuals would have more time to engage in activities outside workoutside of work, such as spending time with family, pursuing hobbies, and engaging in self-care practices. For example, in Sweden, several companies have implemented shorter working hours and achieved positive outcomeshave implemented shorter working hours with positive outcomes. An experiment byThe experiment conducted by the Toyota service centre in Gothenburg demonstrated that a six-hour workday not only led to improved employee well-being but also resulted in increased productivity and customer satisfaction.
Another reason to reduce working hoursreason to support the reduction of working hours is the potential for increased productivity and efficiency in the workplace. While it may seem counterintuitive to suggest that shorter working hours can lead to higher output, evidence has shown otherwiseresearch and examples have shown otherwise. For instance, in 2019, Microsoft Japan conducted an experiment known as the "Work-Life Choice Challenge," in which it implemented a four-day workweekwhere they implemented a four-day workweek. The results were remarkable, with productivity increasing by 40%.
In conclusion, the advancements in technology and automation have significantly reduced the demand for manual labour. As a result, it is crucial to adjust working hoursadapt the working hours in offices and factories to align with the changing landscape. Reducing working hours not only promotes a healthier work-life balance but also enhances employee well-being, job satisfaction, and productivity.
Why this response received Band 8.0
The response presents a clear, consistent position and supports it with well-developed, specific examples, while maintaining smooth progression and strong control of language. Its main limitation is that the discussion focuses more on the general benefits of shorter hours than on explaining how technological and automated productivity gains justify the proposed reduction. The highest priority is to make that causal connection explicit throughout the body paragraphs while preserving the essay's concise, polished style.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
The essay directly states and consistently supports strong agreement with two well-developed reasons and specific, relevant examples.
Make the link between automation-driven efficiency and the feasibility of shorter hours explicit in each main argument.
Coherence and Cohesion
The response progresses smoothly from a clear position through two focused arguments to a consistent conclusion, with well-managed cohesion throughout.
Refine the transition between the two body arguments so their combined logic builds more explicitly toward the conclusion.
Lexical Resource
Vocabulary is wide, precise, and natural, with effective control of topic-specific and evaluative language across the response.
Replace the slightly general phrase changing landscape with a more specific reference to automation-led productivity gains.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A wide range of complex sentence structures is used accurately and flexibly, with punctuation and agreement consistently well controlled.
Maintain this strong accuracy while varying the repeated gerund-led constructions used to describe the benefits of reduced hours.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Advances in technology and automation have reduced the need for manual labour. Therefore working hours in offices and factories should be reduced. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.