Some people think that all teenagers should be required to do unpaid work in their free time to help the local community. They believe this would benefit both the individual teenager and society as a whole. Do you agree or disagree?
Sample Response
Many young people work voluntarilyon a volunteer basis, and this can be beneficialcan only be beneficial for both the individual and society as a whole. However, I do not agree that we should therefore requireforce all teenagers to do unpaid work.
Most young people are already under enough academic pressureunder enough pressure with their studies, without being given the added responsibility of working in their spare time. School is just as demanding as a full-time job, and teachers expect their students to complete homework and revise for examsdo homework and exam revision on top of attending lessons every day. When young people do have some free time, we should encourage them to enjoy it with their friends or to spend it playingdoing sports and other leisure activities. They have many years of work ahead of them when they finish their studies.
MoreoverAt the same time, I do not believe that society would gain anythinghas anything to gain from obliging young people to do unpaid work. In fact, I would argue that it conflicts with the valuesgoes against the values of a free and fair society to force a group of people to do something against their will. Doing this can only lead to resentment amongst young people, who would feel that they were being used, and parents, who would not want to be told how to raise their children. Currently, nobody is forced to volunteer, and this is surely the best system.
In conclusion, teenagers may choose to work for free and help others, but in my opinion we should not make this compulsory.
Why this response received Band 8.0
The response’s strongest feature is its clear, unwavering position, supported by two logically developed arguments about academic pressure and personal freedom. Its main limitation is that some claims, especially that society has nothing to gain, are stated rather absolutely and receive no concrete illustration. The highest-priority improvement is to qualify these claims and add a specific example showing why compulsory service could create resentment or undermine voluntary participation.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
The response directly answers the question with a clear position and develops two relevant, persuasive reasons.
Support the argument with a specific real-world or hypothetical example and qualify the most absolute claims.
Coherence and Cohesion
Ideas progress logically through focused paragraphs, with cohesive devices used naturally and unobtrusively.
Strengthen the transition between the personal and societal arguments by making their relationship more explicit.
Lexical Resource
Vocabulary is varied, precise, and appropriately formal, with effective phrases such as academic pressure and against their will.
Refine broad expressions such as anything to gain so the argument conveys greater nuance and precision.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A wide range of complex structures is used accurately, and sentences remain clear throughout.
Continue refining clause balance in the longest sentences to make already accurate writing even more concise.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Some people think that all teenagers should be required to do unpaid work in their free time to help the local community. They believe this would benefit both the individual teenager and society as a whole. Do you agree or disagree?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.