Tourism is one of the fastest growing industries and contributes a great deal to economies around the world. However, the damage tourism can cause to local cultures and the environment is often ignored. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Sample Response
It is true that tourism has become a significant source of national revenuesource of the national budget for several countries over the world. Those countries concern and allocate more money to develop the tourism industry in achieving the bigger income as well as the satisfaction of tourists. However, some people express this kind of disagreementshow such kind of disagreements with this policyto this affirmative action by considering the effect of tourism onto local communitiesthe local society culturally and environmentally. I personally believe that this disagreement is not justifiedthis agreement is not truly correct in because of several reasons. This essay aims to show my support forstance to support the development of tourism and provides several convincing arguments regarding this controversial issue. The first reason is that the tourism sector contributestourism sector contributes substantial incomesuch big income to the country through economic activities run by communities near tourist destinationssocieties around the tourism places. It is clear that tourism is now becoming an industry that creates thousands of jobs for citizensthe citizen in terms of its management, protection as well as promotion. People with English-language skillswho have skill in English probably would build a tour and travel business and become a guide. For those who have certain creativity or arts may sell their products of arts in a shop, or people might sell some soft drinks and snack to the tourists. All these economic activitiesThese all economic activities crucially contribute to achieving the goal of government to create jobsprovide job fields and to give the prosperity of society. The second reason is that developing and promoting tourist destinationstourism object is the most effective way to promote a positive national imagebroadcast the positive-country-image to the global society in order to attract them to come to those countries as tourists or even as investors. Moreover, going to beautiful tourism places has inevitably been a demand for people over the world and it is a kind of “golden chance” for every country to promote the best places in their regions. Let us take Bali Island as an example, which has been successfully promoted and being promoted as the image of a piece of paradise in Indonesia. On the other hand, some local people tend to opposerefuse the policy of the government in developing tourism. The reason is so simple because they consider the harms of tourism development that cause cultural loss and environmental damage. However, I believe that both cultural and environmental protection are the parts of tourism development on how government allocate the budget to tourism sector for creating a clean environment or ecotourism and promoting cultural tourism in which environment and culture are the basis of tourism. All in all, tourism development does not harm the cultural values and environmental parts. Moreover, it supports the existence of local values as well as keeps the environment clean and green.
Why this response received Band 5.5
The response presents a consistent pro-tourism position and offers relevant economic examples, including employment and investment. However, most of the discussion explains tourism’s benefits rather than directly evaluating whether cultural and environmental damage is ignored, and the final rebuttal is asserted more than demonstrated. The highest-priority improvement is to analyse the claimed damage directly, weigh it against realistic safeguards, and support the conclusion with specific evidence.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
A clear stance and relevant economic benefits are presented, but the central claim about ignored cultural and environmental damage is only briefly addressed.
Focus the body on whether such damage is overlooked, using developed evidence about both the harm and the effectiveness of proposed protections.
Coherence and Cohesion
The sequence from benefits to a counterargument is understandable, but the single long paragraph, repetitive staging, and overextended introduction weaken progression.
Use distinct paragraphs for the position, economic case, environmental and cultural counterargument, and final evaluation, with less mechanical signposting.
Lexical Resource
The response shows some topical range, but frequent inaccurate collocations and word choices reduce precision and occasionally obscure the intended meaning.
Use standard phrases for tourism revenue, local employment, cultural preservation, and environmental protection, checking each noun and verb combination for naturalness.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A variety of structures is attempted, but frequent errors in articles, agreement, plurals, clause construction, and sentence boundaries limit control.
Build shorter complete sentences first, then check that every clause has a grammatical subject and verb before adding subordinate detail.
Write this task while it is fresh
Try the same task now. It helps you remember the feedback and write better next time.
IELTS Writing Task 2
Tourism is one of the fastest growing industries and contributes a great deal to economies around the world. However, the damage tourism can cause to local cultures and the environment is often ignored. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.