Some people think that traditional games are better than modern games in helping children develop their abilities. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Sample Response
It is sometimes asserted that traditional games are more beneficial to children’s skill development than modern ones. I largely agree with this assertion, as old games often foster creativity and an active lifestyle, despite the technological skills that modern activities can help develop. The main reason I prefer traditional gamesThe primary reason for my preference for traditional games is their positive impact on a child’s creativity. Many old games, such as rock climbing, mushroom collecting, and fishing, allow children to engage with nature, which can be an excellent source of inspiration and novel ideas. For example, Gaudi, the renowned Spanish architect, spent much of his childhood exploring forests and observing wildlifeexploring forests, playing among trees and animals. This connection with nature profoundly influenced his architectural style, as seen in his iconic designs such asiconic designs like the Sagrada Família, inspired by natural forms such as dry leaves and ant nests. Another significant advantage of traditional games is their emphasis on physical activity. It is widely recognized that most traditional games involve a range of physical activitiesa variety of physical movements that contribute to a child’s physical health. For instance, in the Korean game “ Squid Game,” players must jump on one leg to move between zones and run quickly to outmaneuver their opponents and score points for their teamscore for their team. In contrast, many modern games are more sedentary, requiring children to sit for extended periods usingwith a handheld device. However, I acknowledge the value of modern games in developing digital and transferable skillstechnical skills. Through interactive games, children todaycontemporary children frequently engage with technology, acquiring essential skills such as typing, logical thinking, and teamwork. These abilities can help them adapt more effectively to today’s technology-driven work environments, where such skills are often indispensable. In conclusion, I support the view that traditional games are generally more advantageous for children’s skill development due to their benefits for creativity and physical health. However, modern games also play a role in enhancing technological proficiency. Therefore, contemporary parents should encourage their childrenoffspring to participate in traditional games while limiting the time spent on video games.
Why this response received Band 7.5
The response offers a clear qualified position and develops it through relevant discussion of creativity, physical activity, and technological skills, using a broad and generally precise vocabulary. Its main limitation is the presentation of the entire argument as one long paragraph, which weakens the visible organization despite clear internal transitions. The priority is to divide the essay into purposeful paragraphs and ensure examples are framed convincingly as games.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
The position is clear and consistent, and the main reasons are extended with relevant explanation and examples, despite some debatable classifications of traditional games.
Use examples that are unambiguously games and link each one more directly to the specific ability it develops.
Coherence and Cohesion
Ideas follow a clear sequence with effective internal transitions, but the lack of paragraph breaks obscures the essay's otherwise sound structure.
Separate the introduction, each main idea, the concession, and the conclusion into distinct, purposeful paragraphs.
Lexical Resource
The response uses a wide vocabulary with good precision and flexibility, though a few choices such as old games and contemporary children feel less natural.
Refine collocations and register so that sophisticated vocabulary remains consistently idiomatic rather than occasionally over-formal.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Complex and simple structures are varied confidently, with accurate control of clauses, agreement, and punctuation across the response.
Preserve this accuracy while varying sentence openings to make the extended discussion feel even more fluid.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Some people think that traditional games are better than modern games in helping children develop their abilities. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.