Today people are travelling more than ever before. Why is this the case? What are the benefits of travelling for the traveller?
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Sample Response
People are travelling more than ever before recentlyin recent times. Achieving quality education from abroad is the main reason for this, and the major benefits of travelling for the traveller are they will be entertained by watching exciting things around them and personality development. The main reason people travel more todayThe main reason of people travelling more today is to achieve quality education from abroad. This is because degreesThis is because, degrees from their own countries may not be valued as highlymay not have more value. Instead, if they have degrees from abroad, people can compete for excellent jobscompete with other individuals for amazing jobs, and such jobs improve people’s standard of livingand by having such jobs, people’s standard of living improves. For example, many engineers in India are travelling abroad in order to complete their higher education and by achieving quality education from abroad, they can get a phenomenal job anywhere across the world. One benefit of travelling for the traveller is that they are amusedammused by watching exciting things while travelling.This is because people usuallyThis is because, usually people at home have a busy lifestylea hectic life style and they follow their usual routinesdo their normal routine work. While travelling, travellers see fascinating sightsobserve mesmerizing lights and new things along the waynew things on their way and get entertained. Moreover, travelling helps in a traveller’s personal developmentin personality development of a traveller. This is because, on an aeroplanein an airbus they have to wait for a long time to reach their destinationfor their destination to come, which develops patiencedevelops the quality of patience in travellers. For example, while travelling from Melbourne to Hyderabad, travellers have to spend 16 hours on an aircraftwait for 16 hours in an aircraft which develops patience and their overall personal developmentoverall personality development in them. In conclusion, today people are travelling more than ever before, to achieve quality education from abroad is the main reason of travelling, and the main benefits of travelling for the traveller are getting entertained by watching exciting things while travelling and personality development.
Why this response received Band 6.0
The response clearly covers both questions and maintains an easily followed structure, with relevant examples supporting its central points. Its main limitation is that the proposed benefits are repetitive and sometimes unconvincing, particularly the claim that waiting on a flight develops one's overall personality. The highest-priority improvement is to develop fewer benefits through more precise, realistic causal explanation.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
Both questions are answered with relevant main ideas, although the benefits are unevenly developed and sometimes weakly justified.
Explain each benefit through a more convincing causal chain and a specific, realistic example.
Coherence and Cohesion
The response progresses clearly from the reason for travel to two benefits, but repetitive framing makes cohesion mechanical.
Vary the way explanations are connected and reduce repeated phrases such as 'This is because'.
Lexical Resource
There is sufficient topic vocabulary and some less common language, though spelling and collocational inaccuracies reduce precision.
Prioritize accurate, natural word combinations and check forms such as 'amused' and 'lifestyle'.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A mix of simple and complex structures communicates the ideas clearly despite recurring article, preposition, punctuation, and sentence-structure errors.
Review clause boundaries and avoid unnecessary commas after subordinators such as 'because'.