Tobacco should be treated as illegal like other drugs. Smoking has not a single positive issue but lots of negative effects and therefore, it should be banned. To what extent do you agree or disagree with the above statement.

Same questionCompare 2 different answers (Band 6)

Sample Response

1

Health is considered the most precious gift that we all have, so it ishave so it is essential to think carefully about things that may have a harmful effect on individuals. Many people argue that tobacco smoking should be considered illegal likeas other drugs because it has more harmsdetriments than benefits. However, this is refuted by others. Both sides will be examinedcritiqued before a reasoned conclusion is formed. It is felt by many that cigarette smoking has deleterious effects on a person's lifeon person's life. For example, it has been shown byin many research studies that tobacco is one of the risk factors forto many diseases including cancer, particularly lung cancer, cardiovascular diseases and others. This example clearly shows that smoking can be very harmful and placeshas a tremendous financial burden on not only personal budgetsthe personal budget but also the health sectorhealth sector. On the other handside, many people think that smoking is a personal decision. In addition, it cannot be compared to drugs as it provides health benefits like memory and attention enhancing and preventing ulcerative colitis. Moreover, it is used in some medications. After analysing these two points of view, I believe that the cons of smoking outweigh the pros and tobacco usethe usage of tobacco should be restricted to medical treatmentslimited for medical treatments authorised by governments. Without a doubt, I think that smoking is an important topic that affectshas effects on various aspects of humanhuman's life and other people's liveslife as no one focusesfocus on the passive smoking issue and the government should pay more attention and invent new policies regarding smoking.

Overall assessment

Why this response received Band 6.0

The response presents a clear qualified position that the harms of tobacco outweigh limited benefits, and it supports this with relevant health and financial considerations. Its main limitation is uneven development: the medical-benefit claims are asserted briefly, passive smoking appears only at the end, and the absence of paragraphing weakens the argument's shape. The priority is to organize distinct body paragraphs and explain how the evidence justifies the proposed legal restriction.

Band score breakdown

IELTS Writing Criteria Scores

TR

Task Response

6.5
Scoring rule

The response gives a clear qualified view and relevant arguments on both sides, but some claims and the proposed restriction are not fully developed.

Next step

Explain more directly why the evidence supports a medical-use exception rather than either a complete ban or unrestricted personal choice.

CC

Coherence and Cohesion

5.5
Scoring rule

The argument progresses from harms to counterarguments and a conclusion, but presenting the entire response as one paragraph weakens its internal structure.

Next step

Separate the introduction, opposing arguments, and conclusion into purposeful paragraphs with clearer links between evidence and position.

LR

Lexical Resource

6.5
Scoring rule

There is a good range of topic-specific and evaluative vocabulary, although several collocations and possessive expressions are inaccurate or awkward.

Next step

Use natural phrases such as "harmful effects," "enhancing memory and attention," and "people's lives," and avoid inflated wording.

GRA

Grammatical Range and Accuracy

6.0
Scoring rule

A mix of complex and simple sentences communicates meaning clearly overall, despite recurring errors with articles, agreement, possessives, and clause control.

Next step

Check article use and subject-verb agreement systematically, particularly in sentences with multiple subjects or embedded clauses.

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IELTS Writing Task 2

Tobacco should be treated as illegal like other drugs. Smoking has not a single positive issue but lots of negative effects and therefore, it should be banned. To what extent do you agree or disagree with the above statement.

Your response

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