Some people think that a huge amount of time and money is spent on the protection of wild animals and that this money could be better spent on the human population. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?
Sample Response
To begin with, the factors that have contributedthe dynamics which have contributed to the decline of wildlifethe ailing health of the wildlife are largely attributable to human actionsmajorly relevant to human actions. The useusages of certain environmental pollutantsdeterrents like chlorofluorocarbons, DDT, and other hazardous pollutants have been major causesculprits in this regard. That being said, a lot of damage has already been donea lot of damage is already done, which to a largelarger extent is irreversibleirrecuperable. The need of the hour, however, is to preserve and protect wildlifefortify the wildlife. For instance, the Asiatic lionthe species of Asiatic Lion, which is now found onlywhich are only found in parts of India now, has been deemed endangeredwere deemed ‘Endangered’ mainly because of habitat loss owing to climate change, grazing, growing agricultural demands, etc. Therefore, it is essentialit is of prime essence that the authoritiesthe government and authorities should indeed focus on appropriate measuresthe judicial methods to safeguard the wildlife.
The government should invest in the rehabilitation of the natural environment, as in the purview of substantial development it is very crucial that nature and its resources are intact and unblemished. It could appear as a difficult decisionan arduous deal to spend fundsmoney and capital on wildlife. Conversely, it could promote and foster economical status as India largely attracts the international footfall for its flora and fauna, and hence it rather would be a prudential decision to strengthen the tourism baseline and capital bolstering.
Conclusively, it is in the best of human interest that the government spends and invests in the fortification of conservation of wildlife and is not at all an extravagance. (301 words)
Why this response received Band 6.5
The response gives a clear defence of wildlife spending and supports it with both environmental responsibility and economic benefit, while maintaining a broadly logical progression. Its main limitation is limited engagement with the proposed alternative of spending on people, compounded by a slightly under-length response and frequently imprecise word choices. Directly compare the competing priorities and develop that comparison in accurate, natural language.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
A clear disagreement is supported by two relevant reasons, but the alternative case for human spending is barely examined and development is constrained by the short length.
Compare wildlife protection directly with specific human needs and explain why the proposed spending remains justified despite that opportunity cost.
Coherence and Cohesion
The two main reasons follow a sensible sequence and paragraphing is clear, although the missing introduction and some mechanical transitions weaken overall progression.
Open with a concise position and use topic sentences that show how each paragraph advances the comparison required by the question.
Lexical Resource
There is a wide attempted range, but frequent inaccurate collocations and word choices make several claims imprecise or unnatural.
Replace inflated expressions such as judicial methods, economical status, and capital bolstering with precise topic-specific vocabulary.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Complex sentences are attempted successfully enough to keep meaning clear, though article, agreement, tense, and clause-control errors recur.
Use more controlled sentence structures and check agreement and article choices, especially when sentences contain several linked clauses.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Some people think that a huge amount of time and money is spent on the protection of wild animals and that this money could be better spent on the human population. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.