Nowadays many people work part or full time from home. Some people say that working from home has many benefits while others disagree. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
Sample Response
Technology has revolutionised the way human beings go about their daily life. This is evident from the fact that many people nowadays work from the comfort of their homes. Some argue that this practice brings with its myriad of benefits, while others refute this. Both sides of this debate will be analysed in this essay before a reasoned conclusion is reached.
On the one hand, working from home can save an employer office rental costs to a great degree. For example, Sydney, Australia is one such place where the costs of renting an office space have risen to exorbitant levels in the past few decades. As a result, a large proportion of employers’ funds have to be devoted to this area, and this encumbers their ability to earn a decent profit. When looking at the discussion in this light, the merits of working from one’s home are clearly seen.
On the other hand, many contend that drawbacks of working from home outweigh its benefits. For instance, a recent British study found that majority of the people working from home had trouble meeting deadlines that were set by their organisations. This habitual lateness can lead to failure to the achievement of organisational goals. Thus, it is obvious why many people do not support the notion of working from home.
After pondering upon both sides of this argument, it is felt that working from home is much more of a positive development than negative. It is thus hoped that people and organisations will continue to reap the bounties of working from home into the foreseeable future.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Fix number agreement Original: life Suggested revision: lives Why it matters: The plural possessive their requires the plural noun lives when referring to people individually.
- 2. Fix pronoun phrase Original: brings with its myriad of benefits Suggested revision: brings with it a myriad of benefits Why it matters: The construction requires the object pronoun it and the article a before myriad.
- 3. Clarify opposition Original: others refute this Suggested revision: others reject this view Why it matters: Reject this view states the object of disagreement more naturally.
- 4. Close place appositive Original: Sydney, Australia is Suggested revision: Sydney, Australia, is Why it matters: The country name is a nonessential appositive and needs a closing comma.
- 5. Use natural verb Original: encumbers Suggested revision: limits Why it matters: Limits is the more natural verb for describing a constraint on profitability.
- 6. Add definite article Original: contend that drawbacks Suggested revision: contend that the drawbacks Why it matters: The specific drawbacks of working from home require the definite article.
- 7. Add definite article Original: that majority of the people Suggested revision: that the majority of the people Why it matters: Majority requires the definite article in this construction.
- 8. Correct noun pattern Original: failure to the achievement Suggested revision: failure to achieve Why it matters: Failure to is followed naturally by an infinitive when describing an unrealised goal.
- 9. Use concise wording Original: pondering upon Suggested revision: considering Why it matters: Considering expresses the same meaning more directly in formal prose.
- 10. Complete comparison Original: than negative Suggested revision: than a negative one Why it matters: The comparison needs a parallel noun phrase after than.
- 11. Correct collocation Original: bounties Suggested revision: benefits Why it matters: Reap the benefits is the established collocation for receiving positive results.
- 12. Use concise reference Original: human beings Suggested revision: people Why it matters: People is a more direct and natural term in this general statement.
Suggested Rewrites
- life lives
- brings with its myriad of benefits brings with it a myriad of benefits
- others refute this others reject this view
- Sydney, Australia is Sydney, Australia, is
- encumbers limits
- contend that drawbacks contend that the drawbacks
Why this response received Band 7.0
The response is easy to follow, addresses both views, and maintains a clear favourable opinion, with well-controlled paragraph progression and varied language. The main limitation is that each side rests on only one somewhat narrow example, so the argument is less fully developed than its fluent presentation suggests. The highest-priority improvement is to deepen the explanation of both perspectives and connect the final preference more explicitly to the evidence presented.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
Both views and the writer's opinion are clear, but the arguments are relatively narrow and only moderately developed.
Explain a broader consequence of each example and show directly why the benefit ultimately outweighs the drawback.
Coherence and Cohesion
Ideas progress logically through a clear four-paragraph structure, with effective referencing and cohesive links throughout.
Make transitions less formulaic by linking the conclusion directly to the specific reasoning developed in the body paragraphs.
Lexical Resource
The response uses a broad and generally precise vocabulary, though occasional awkward collocations and word forms remain.
Refine phrases such as brings with it a myriad of benefits and failure to achieve organisational goals for fully natural usage.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Varied complex sentences are mostly well controlled, with a few errors in articles, possessives, and comparative constructions.
Check noun phrases and comparison structures carefully, especially expressions involving employer costs, majorities, and positive versus negative outcomes.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Nowadays many people work part or full time from home. Some people say that working from home has many benefits while others disagree. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.