Some people think that zoos are all cruel and should be closed down. Others however believe that zoos can be useful in protecting wild animals. Discuss both opinions and give your own opinion.
Sample Response
Zoos remain popular places for people to visit for entertainment and to learn about wild animals. Although some people are of the opinion that zoos can provide a sanctuary for endangered animals and so should be kept open, I believe that the cruelty that animals suffer outweighs this benefit, and that they should be shut down.
These days, animals are under threat from humans in many ways, as illustrated by howseen for example in the way that their habitats are being destroyed through the cutting down of rain forests, or through poaching. Against this backgroundFollowing on from this, the argument is that zoos can protect some of these threatened animalssome of these animals that are under threat. The reason is that they are in a safe environment managed by trained staff who can ensure the animals are looked after and can produce offspring. There are examples of successsuccesses in this respect, such as with pandasPandas, which have been endangered for many years but have been protected.
However, there are more convincing arguments for why zoos should be shut down. Firstly, even though some species are under threat, there are lots of animals thatwhich do not fall into this category and that are kept there justwho are there just for the entertainment of visitors. While it may be fun and educational to see them, animals are not meant to be caged, and their distress can often be seen in the way many of them pace back and forthforwards all day. MoreoverNot only this, if the primary purpose of zoosprime reason of zoos is to protect animals, this could be done in other environments such as wild life parks where the animals have more freedom.
In conclusion, animals should be protected but this does not have to be in zoos. Zoos are cruel to animals, not similar enough to their natural habitat, and they should be closed down.
Why this response received Band 8.0
The essay addresses both views directly, sustains a clear opinion, and develops its reasoning through well-selected explanations and examples. Its main limitation is a small number of imprecise or slightly awkward expressions, while some claims could be qualified more carefully. The highest-priority improvement is to refine lexical precision and make the conservation example more specific without sacrificing the response's strong focus and progression.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
Both opinions are explored in sufficient depth, and the writer's view is explicit and consistently supported throughout.
Strengthen the conservation discussion with a more precise explanation of how zoo breeding contributes to species protection.
Coherence and Cohesion
Ideas progress logically through a focused introduction, two clearly contrasted body paragraphs, and a concise conclusion, with cohesion handled effectively.
Refine a few linking phrases so connections arise even more naturally from the argument rather than from explicit signposting.
Lexical Resource
Vocabulary is varied and generally precise, with only occasional awkward choices such as "the prime reason of zoos" and "wild life parks."
Polish collocations and word forms, using phrasing such as the primary purpose of zoos and wildlife parks.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
The essay uses a wide range of complex structures with strong control, and the few minor slips do not impede communication.
Maintain the same range while checking long sentences for the most concise and natural clause structure.
Write this task while it is fresh
Try the same task now. It helps you remember the feedback and write better next time.
IELTS Writing Task 2
Some people think that zoos are all cruel and should be closed down. Others however believe that zoos can be useful in protecting wild animals. Discuss both opinions and give your own opinion.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.