In schools and universities, girls tend to choose arts while boys like science. What are the reasons for this trend and do you think this tendency should be changed?
Sample Response
The field of science has been dominated by men for generations and in the humanitiesas for humanities, the gender ratio tends to be in favour of womenin the favour of women. Although various factors have facilitated this trend for centuries, I believe a change toin such societal norms is a healthy and necessary transformation.
This tendency among boys to opt for subjects that are more science-oriented whereas the majority of girls seemingly choose liberal arts when deciding the core subjects is a result of several complicated reasons. The origin of this phenomenon can be traced to the beliefs held bycan be traced back to the ideologies of certain bigoted segments of society who believe that men are more competent in the realms of science and even commerce whereas women are better suited for domestic rolesdomesticated disciplines. Furthermore, due to such shallow beliefs in society and the lack of support, students are often obligated to follow the majority and give up on their interests.
In my opinion, there is a serious need to alter such narrow-minded perspectives among people, especially parents, as they limit countless studentsserve as a limitation for countless students. The consequences of this tendencyrepercussions of this habit can be observed in the situation faced by engineering graduatescondition of engineering graduates in the present day, where a sizable proportionchunk of engineering degree holders are either unemployed or lookingare either unemployed or are looking for a change in their careers.
Finally, I would like to conclude by saying that the gender of an individual is in no way an indicator of the potential and capabilities of that person. We must open our minds and adopt a more liberal viewpoint on things because our judgement and beliefs affect others more than we can fathom.
Why this response received Band 7.0
The response takes a clear position and uses a strong range of language to explain how social expectations shape subject choices. Its main limitation is that the case for change relies on a somewhat indirect example about dissatisfied engineering graduates, so the argument is less fully developed than it could be. Prioritise a specific explanation of how changing expectations would benefit individual students and society.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
Both questions are answered clearly, and the reasons are relevant, although the supporting example for change is only partly convincing.
Develop the benefits of changing gendered expectations with a direct, specific example linked to students' choices.
Coherence and Cohesion
Ideas progress logically through a clear introduction, reasons, opinion, and conclusion, with generally effective paragraphing and linking.
Give the third paragraph a more fully developed internal progression from claim to explanation and consequence.
Lexical Resource
A broad and confident vocabulary conveys nuanced ideas, though several choices such as 'domesticated disciplines' sound imprecise or unnatural.
Prefer precise, natural collocations when describing academic fields and social attitudes.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A wide range of complex structures is handled with strong control, and the few awkward constructions do not impede meaning.
Refine the structure of long comparative sentences so modifiers and contrasts attach more cleanly to their subjects.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
In schools and universities, girls tend to choose arts while boys like science. What are the reasons for this trend and do you think this tendency should be changed?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.