People continue to commit crimes even after being punished for it. Why do you think this happens? How can crime be stopped?
Sample Response
Nowadays, it is common for ex-offenders to violateit is common that ex-offenders violate the law repeatedly even after they have been punishedalthough they have been punished. In this essay, I will firstinitially discuss the reasons for this situation, followed by my suggestions for preventing further crimesuggestions which can assist in preventing crimes from happening.
There are two main factors responsibleprimarily two factors largely responsible for recidivism. To begincommence with, the penalties imposed on criminalsthe sanctions against criminals are not harsh enough. In other words, being punished does not make a huge difference to offenders, leading to the possibility that these people are normally unable to realise the detrimental consequences that breaching the law will entail for victims and society, and such behaviour is likely to be re-exhibited as a result. Additionally, former convicts are not completely accepted byin society. People released from prison seem to be automatically judged to have poor characterjudged as those whose character is poor: their family and friends may not acceptembrace them and employers refuse to recruit them. Therefore, nothing can help them to survive but to re-offend.
To reduce crimeTo cease crimes, several approaches can be adopted. Firstly, implementing more punitive measures may be effectivethe implementation of more punitive measures is effective. Only when people are truly fully aware of the consequences of their wrongdoingconscious of their wrongdoing both physically and psychologically can they stop themselves from committing crimes. For instance, a longer period of community service or a longer jail sentencea longer stint of community service or jail sentence may be appropriate for people convicted of minor and serious crimes, respectivelyis respectively appropriate for convicts with minor crimes and serious ones. Secondly, providing more vocational trainingvocational training sessions and job opportunities for those with criminal records is another feasible solution. If they can earn a living independently, having sufficient money to afford accommodation and feed themselves, they are rarely motivated to participate in some illegal activities again.
In conclusion, lenient punishments for law breakers and society's limited acceptance of former offendersless social tolerance for previous criminals are the two major causes of re-offending. However, if harsherseverer penalties can be meted out to prisoners and meanwhile ex-criminals are allowed to have a smoother re-entry into the community, crime issues can be tackled.
Why this response received Band 7.0
The response gives a complete, well-organised answer by pairing two plausible causes of reoffending with corresponding solutions and supporting each with explanation. Its main limitation is the recurring use of unnatural collocations and a few overextended constructions, which weakens precision despite generally clear meaning. Prioritising more idiomatic wording and tightening the causal explanations would make the argument more authoritative and fluent.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
Both questions are fully addressed with relevant causes, practical solutions, and generally clear supporting explanation.
Develop the claim that harsher punishment prevents reoffending with more convincing causal reasoning rather than relying mainly on assertion.
Coherence and Cohesion
The cause-and-solution structure is easy to follow, and paragraphing supports a clear overall progression.
Use fewer mechanical sequencing phrases and simplify long causal sentences so that relationships between ideas are immediately clear.
Lexical Resource
Vocabulary shows good range and topic awareness, although several inaccurate or unnatural collocations reduce precision.
Replace phrases such as "cease crimes," "re-exhibited," and "previous criminals" with natural, context-appropriate alternatives.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
The response uses a range of complex structures with generally good control, though some constructions are awkward or overloaded.
Break up lengthy sentences and refine clause connections, especially where multiple causal ideas are compressed into one structure.
Write this task while it is fresh
Try the same task now. It helps you remember the feedback and write better next time.
IELTS Writing Task 2
People continue to commit crimes even after being punished for it. Why do you think this happens? How can crime be stopped?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.