Some Companies Sponsor Sports And Sports Stars To Promote themselves Some Believe it is Good While others Believe it Has Disadvantages?
Sample Response
It is seen that some companies provide financial assistance to sports organisations and athletesfinancial assistance to sports and sports athletes in order to increase their public visibilitygain commercial popularity. Sponsorship is consideredIt has been considered both advantageous and disadvantageous. FromIn my perspective, it might damage the reputations of some sports and playersdestroy the reputation of some games and players due to the lack of rigid rules. At the same timeOtherwise, sponsorship is a great boon for players who are unable to cover the costs of equipment, travel and accommodationbear the expenses of kit, travel and accommodation.
Considering its meritsBy looking at its merits, it is good to support athletes. Sometimes, it is challenging for them to pay for training and accommodationpay for training and arrange their accommodation. Because it is an expensive affair, a few good players lag behind and stop playing in the Olympics or World Cup. Therefore, it is a boon for them. If players are getting essential financial supportmandatory help, the companies that promote themthe companies, which promote them, will also become popular. For instance, the Red Bull energy drink is one of the favourite drinks of youngsters. Since the athletesthe sports players have advertised it, its sales are still increasing.
After analysing its positive aspects, its downside cannot be overlooked. Firstly, sponsorship kills the players’ enthusiasm and puts them under greater pressuremakes them pressurised more. To elaborate, companies force them to focus on victory in a match. As a resultResultantly, sports persons do not feel free to playdo not feel liberated to play the game. Thus, they do not have enough zeal for the game, which sometimes can cause them to failbecomes a cause of their failure. Moreover, the chances of match-fixing are higher, making any potential player lose the game. The clear example of thisclassical epitome of it can be seen in the historypast history of cricket. Ajay Jadeja, an ex-sports player, did it, and even today, people have not forgotten that incident. In addition, for the sake of earning more profit, these individuals are told to advertise the brand of their company, and people blindly follow them and develop unhealthy habits such as consuming fast food, drinking energy drinks: Coca-Cola, Thums up as well as spending money lavishly on shopping to buy clothes or footwear.
To conclude, it is apparent that financial help from a few companies can be beneficial for players by giving them a chance to play inland or overseas. However, indirectly escalates bad reputation due to advertisements by athletes on fast food and energy drinks.
Why this response received Band 6.5
The response covers both benefits and drawbacks and offers several relevant examples, with the financial support for athletes being the clearest developed point. Its main limitation is that some causal claims, particularly those linking sponsorship to pressure, match-fixing, and unhealthy behaviour, are asserted imprecisely, while the conclusion is grammatically incomplete; the highest-priority improvement is to explain fewer drawbacks more logically and state a clear final judgment in a complete sentence.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
Both sides are addressed and supported with examples, but several claims are only partly explained and the final position is not fully clear.
Select fewer disadvantages and explain the causal connection between sponsorship and each claimed outcome before giving an explicit final judgment.
Coherence and Cohesion
The response has a clear overall structure, though progression within the disadvantages paragraph becomes crowded and some linking is mechanical.
Separate distinct drawbacks into a more controlled sequence and use references that clearly identify the companies, athletes, or consumers being discussed.
Lexical Resource
There is enough range to discuss the topic, but frequent awkward collocations and imprecise word choices reduce clarity and naturalness.
Replace expressions such as makes them pressurised more and escalates bad reputation with accurate, natural collocations.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
The response uses both simple and complex forms, but recurring errors in sentence construction, agreement, and punctuation reduce control.
Prioritise complete clause structure, especially in the conclusion, and check long lists for parallel grammar and clear punctuation.
Write this task while it is fresh
Try the same task now. It helps you remember the feedback and write better next time.
IELTS Writing Task 2
Some Companies Sponsor Sports And Sports Stars To Promote themselves Some Believe it is Good While others Believe it Has Disadvantages?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.