Some people think that young people should be required to do unpaid work helping people in the community. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?
Sample Response
It is argued that young people should be required to get involvedyoung adults must get involved in the local community without getting paid. While there are several benefits to unpaid community worksuch activities, these are outweighed by the drawbacks. Though young people do not receive any kind of direct remuneration, doing volunteer work may help them prepare mentally for adult lifementally prepare for the life of an adult. Firstly, teenage volunteers may learn to become more responsible. Most people of this ageMost people at these ages are still heavily reliant on their parents and teachers. Therefore, taking part in community work means they are entering a new work environment with little supervision fromof parents and teachers; in other words, they are given a chance to become more independentstand on their own. Furthermore, helping other people can make their lives more fulfilled. It is true that the need to contribute and be recognized is universal and should not be limited to adults, and for teens through community work, this need can be met.
However, the benefits appear less significant than the drawbacks. On the one hand, many teenagers are already overwhelmed by schoolwork and homeworkburned out with schoolwork and homework, which are as demanding as a full-time job. If they are obliged to do unpaid work, this can create a negative impression that their lives consist only of dutiestheir life is nothing but duties. This suggests that the rest of their time should be spent on their hobbies to help them achieve a school-life balancefind school-life balance. On the other hand, as students’ time and capacity is still limited, society gains only limited benefitssociety only gains insignificant benefit from their contribution to community work. What they can support the community at this point may be just some simple paperwork and errands, and two hours of volunteering a week, for instance, is not enough to make a meaningful differencemake a change.
In conclusion, though it can benefit young adults to do unpaid community service to some extent, this should not be made compulsory for all.
Why this response received Band 7.0
The response presents a clear comparative position and supports both sides with relevant, logically connected ideas. Its main limitation is that some claims, especially the suggestion that young people's contributions are insignificant, are asserted rather than fully demonstrated, while several awkward formulations reduce precision. The highest-priority improvement is to develop the weaker drawback with a concrete explanation or example and refine inaccurate phrasing.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
The response addresses the comparison directly, maintains a clear position, and develops relevant advantages and disadvantages, though the final drawback is somewhat speculative.
Support the claim about limited community benefit with a more convincing causal explanation or specific example.
Coherence and Cohesion
Ideas progress logically through the two sides, with clear referencing and generally effective cohesive devices, although the opening paragraph combines introduction and development rather heavily.
Separate the introductory position from the first developed argument and use fewer overt sequencing phrases.
Lexical Resource
A varied vocabulary conveys nuanced ideas effectively, but occasional awkward collocations such as society gaining an insignificant benefit reduce precision.
Check natural collocations and replace forced expressions with simpler, idiomatic wording.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
The response uses a wide range of complex structures with good control, despite occasional agreement and sentence-construction errors.
Proofread complex sentences for subject-verb agreement and ensure subordinate constructions have a clear grammatical subject.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Some people think that young people should be required to do unpaid work helping people in the community. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.