In many countries today, people in cities either live alone or in small family units, rather than in large family groups. Is this a positive or negative trend?
Sample Response
In numerous nations today, more people are living by themselves or in small units rather than living in large families like in the past. Personally, I think that this developmentcomplex new development is on the whole more negative than positive, althoughas although it can afford young people some independence, it can also create feelings of loneliness for many peoplemany parts of the population.
From one point of view, one could argue that living alone can grant young peoplehas also granted young people greater freedom to pursue their own goalsthe ability to do more of what they desire. Without having to spend time taking care of their families, many young people today can instead focus on their personal interestswhat makes them tick, socially and professionally. This in turn leads to them pursuing fields different from those of their parentsgoing into different fields from their parents, allowing them to developcraft their own creative projects. In developing nations such as Vietnam, for instance, many young people have been able to launch their own start-upsengage in their own start-ups, advancing their careers and contributing to the national economypositively improving their career and the national economy.
Conversely, the advent of smaller family units has helped to increase feelings of isolationdrive up a sense of isolation and disconnection from one’s rootsa disconnect with one’s own roots. Living alone diminishes one's primary source of social interaction, which comes from the family, possibly resulting in psychological symptoms of loneliness or even depression. This is why despite being one of the most financially independent generations, millennials today report feelings of low mood more than any previous generationany other previous generations. The prioritization of work and personal ambition, thereforehence, could come at a cost of a limiteddiminutive social life.
In conclusion, I argue that while young people can be more independent when living alonemore independent living alone, this arrangement also brings with it comparatively more serious effects on their mental healththe comparatively worse effects of a worse mental health. Therefore, the trend described in the question is one I argue is unwanted.
Why this response received Band 7.5
The response presents a clear judgement, develops contrasting consequences logically, and supports both sides with relevant explanation and an example. Its main limitation is an overly narrow emphasis on young people, alongside several strained word choices that weaken otherwise fluent argumentation. The highest priority is to address the wider population and both forms of smaller households more consistently while choosing simpler, more idiomatic vocabulary.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
A clear negative judgement is supported with relevant positive and negative arguments, though the discussion focuses too narrowly on young people and living alone.
Extend the analysis to other age groups and small family units so the full scope of the trend is addressed.
Coherence and Cohesion
Ideas progress logically through well-focused paragraphs, with generally effective cohesion and clear relationships between claims and support.
Refine a few connective choices so transitions arise naturally from the argument rather than being inserted mechanically.
Lexical Resource
Vocabulary is varied and often precise, but several strained collocations and unnecessarily elaborate choices reduce naturalness.
Prefer idiomatic phrases such as increased isolation, limited social life, and poorer mental health over less natural alternatives.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A wide range of complex structures is used with strong control, and the few errors rarely interfere with meaning.
Polish article use, comparison structures, and occasional compressed clauses to make already varied sentences consistently accurate.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
In many countries today, people in cities either live alone or in small family units, rather than in large family groups. Is this a positive or negative trend?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.