The plans below show the site of a farm in 1950 and the same site today.
This response is estimated at Band 6.0. Can you write a better one?
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Sample Response
The plans show how the Beechwood Farm site has been redesigned since 1950after the year 1950. Overall, the farm hasOverall, farm has undergone noticeablenoticable changes, including the addition of a camping field, solar panels and different kinds of important facilities.
Prior to the redesign, in 1950, a huge part of the space was dedicated to sheep farmingto a sheep farming, on the top right corner of the map. On the opposite side, in the south-east section, was a barnon the left corner, was a barn along with the farmhouse and the chickens coop. Next to the main road were fruit trees, as well as fieldstrees, also fields of soft fruits and vegetables.
In the redesigned layout, the sheep farm was fully reconstructedreconstracted and few essential amenitiesammenities have been added. This area includes two parking spaces, one located near the camping field and the other in front of the solar panelssolap poanels, next to the road. On the other side of the road, which was changed from the track into a road, the barn, which was reduced in size and relocated next to the chickens coop, has been transformed into holiday cottagesinto the holiday cottages. In addition, a farm shop has been addedfarm shop has been added near the fruit trees, selling a variety ofselling variety of substantialsubstanstial producefarm supplies.
Why this response received Band 6.0
The response effectively provides a clear overview and reports key changes between the two maps, such as the addition of solar panels and a camping field. However, accuracy is reduced by small descriptive errors regarding the precise relocation of buildings and frequent spelling mistakes. To raise the score, focus on accurately reporting how structures were replaced rather than modified, alongside careful proofreading for spelling and article usage.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
The main features are covered with a clear overview, though there are minor inaccuracies in describing specific layout changes such as the barn's exact transformation.
Ensure spatial changes and replacements, such as holiday cottages taking the original position of the barn, are reported with exact accuracy.
Coherence and Cohesion
The overview and detail paragraphs follow a logical structure with appropriate paragraphing and basic connective phrases.
Use clearer spatial transition words to link comparative descriptions between the two time periods more smoothly.
Lexical Resource
A good variety of map-related vocabulary is used, but noticeable spelling errors and imprecise word choices occur.
Proofread carefully to eliminate frequent spelling slips such as 'noticable', 'reconstracted', 'ammenities', and 'solap poanels'.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A mix of simple and complex sentence patterns is attempted, but recurring errors in article usage and prepositions remain evident.
Pay close attention to noun phrases and article insertion, ensuring correct structures like 'a farm shop' and 'sheep farming'.