The charts below show the changes in ownership of electrical appliances and the amount of time spent doing housework in households in one country between 1920 and 2019.
Sample Response
The first line graph outlines how electrical appliance ownership in households in a country changed during a century, commencing from 1920. The second chart delineates how it had affected the time spent on household work per week by the citizens in this country.
As a general trend, with the increasing number of electrical devices possessed by families, their need for doing housework significantly declined.
As the graph reveals, only 30 percent of households in this country had vacuum cleaners and four out of ten families had washing machines in 1920. Refrigerators were a rare electrical appliance at that time. Just after two decades, however, refrigerator possessions shot up, and almost half of the families owned these three electrical items in their homes. More families started to own such devices and at the beginning of the twenty-first century, almost all households had fridges and vacuum cleaners. The washing machine was owned by more than 70% of families which slowly but steadily increased till 2019. At that point, there was hardly any family without a refrigerator or vacuum cleaner.
It is interesting to note that, with the increasing number of families owning those electrical appliances, their need for doing household work like preparing meals, cleaning and washing clothes remarkably diminished. While they used to work for 50 hours a week doing such work in 1920, it decreased to 20 hours in 1960 and 10 in 2019.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Report the measured quantity Original: their need for doing housework Suggested revision: the time they spent on housework Why it matters: The chart measures weekly hours rather than households' need to do housework.
- 2. Match plural subject Original: a rare electrical appliance Suggested revision: rare electrical appliances Why it matters: The plural subject Refrigerators requires a plural complement.
- 3. Use exact time link Original: Just after two decades Suggested revision: Two decades later Why it matters: This phrase clearly links 1920 to the next plotted year, 1940.
- 4. Use ownership collocation Original: possessions Suggested revision: ownership Why it matters: Ownership is the standard term for the percentage of households possessing an appliance.
- 5. Report each series accurately Original: almost half of the families owned these three electrical items in their homes Suggested revision: about 50–60% of families owned each of the three electrical items Why it matters: In 1940, the three figures ranged from 50% to 60%, rather than all being almost half.
- 6. State full ownership Original: almost all households had fridges and vacuum cleaners Suggested revision: all households owned refrigerators and vacuum cleaners Why it matters: Both series reach 100% in 2000, so almost all understates the values.
- 7. Focus on recorded hours Original: their need for doing household work Suggested revision: the time they spent on household work Why it matters: The lower chart records time spent, not the need for housework.
- 8. Clarify the reference Original: it decreased Suggested revision: this figure fell Why it matters: This figure clearly refers to weekly housework hours, while it has an unclear antecedent.
- 9. State the full period Original: changed during a century, commencing from 1920 Suggested revision: changed from 1920 to 2019 Why it matters: The revision gives both endpoints and avoids describing the 99-year span as a full century.
- 10. Use concise ownership wording Original: the increasing number of electrical devices possessed by families Suggested revision: increasing household appliance ownership Why it matters: The revision expresses the measured concept more concisely and precisely.
- 11. Keep units consistent Original: four out of ten families Suggested revision: 40% of households Why it matters: Using the graph's percentage unit makes comparisons between the appliance series easier.
- 12. Specify the overall pattern Original: More families started to own such devices Suggested revision: Ownership of all three appliances rose overall Why it matters: The revision identifies the measured trend and avoids the vague reference such devices.
Suggested Rewrites
- their need for doing housework the time they spent on housework
- a rare electrical appliance rare electrical appliances
- Just after two decades Two decades later
- possessions ownership
- almost half of the families owned these three electrical items in their homes about 50–60% of families owned each of the three electrical items
- almost all households had fridges and vacuum cleaners all households owned refrigerators and vacuum cleaners
Why this response received Band 7.0
The response clearly identifies the inverse overall trends and supports them with accurate beginning and end figures, while its paragraphing makes the two charts easy to follow. The main limitation is incomplete treatment of intermediate changes, particularly the washing-machine dip and the plateau in housework hours; the highest-priority improvement is to compare those notable fluctuations directly and refine several awkward or grammatically loose expressions.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
Both charts are addressed with a clear overview and accurate headline values, but notable intermediate patterns receive limited coverage.
Add the washing-machine fall from 70% to 65% and the housework plateau at 15 hours between 1980 and 2000.
Coherence and Cohesion
Clear paragraphing separates the introduction, overview, appliance ownership, and housework trends in a logical progression.
Strengthen comparison within the appliance paragraph by grouping the two items reaching 100% against the fluctuating washing-machine series.
Lexical Resource
The report uses a broad range of trend vocabulary, although phrases such as 'refrigerator possessions' and 'need for doing housework' are awkward.
Use more natural collocations such as 'refrigerator ownership' and 'time spent doing housework'.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Complex sentences are frequent and meaning remains clear, though several reference and clause-control errors reduce precision.
Revise mismatched structures such as 'families which increased' and 'they used to work... it decreased' so each pronoun has a clear referent.
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IELTS Academic Writing Task 1
The charts below show the changes in ownership of electrical appliances and the amount of time spent doing housework in households in one country between 1920 and 2019.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.