The diagram below shows how one type of desert, known as a rain-shadow desert, is formed.
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Sample Response
The diagram illustrates the variousvarous steps throughtrough which a rain-shadow desert is formedwhich rain-shadow desert is produced.
Overall, it is clear that this process includes seven steps, beginning with winds from the seafrom sea and ending with a rain-shadowwith rain-shadow desert. This process can be divided into two phases.
With regard to the first phase, the first step in that winds approach the coast where it hitcrush the mountain's windward side and then it is pushed upwards. Following this, moist air carried by the windamong winds rises and cools, and form cloudsthen becoming clouds. After that, clouds keep rising, becoming rain and falling. Consequently, the moist air transformsSo, moist air transforms to dry air at the top of the mountain.
During the second phase, dry air continues over the mountainover mountain after which it descends along the leeward sidecrushes the mountain's leeward side and descends, turning intoand it is pushed downwards, becoming dry winds. Following this, dry winds reach inland areas. Finally, rain-shadow desert is formed.
Why this response received Band 6.0
The response successfully covers all main stages of the process in a clear sequence and provides a accurate overview. However, it is slightly under the recommended word count and contains noticeable grammatical agreement issues alongside minor spelling errors. To improve, expand on key features to meet the word count while refining grammatical subject-verb alignment and vocabulary accuracy.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
The response identifies all seven steps presented in the diagram and provides a clear overview of the process.
Elaborate slightly more on key visual details, such as the scale of distance or contrast between sides of the mountain, to meet the minimum word limit.
Coherence and Cohesion
Information is arranged in a logical chronological sequence divided into two clear phases.
Use more varied and natural transition signals instead of mechanical formulas like the first step in that.
Lexical Resource
The response uses an adequate range of task-specific vocabulary, though there are some spelling errors and imprecise word choices.
Replace inaccurate verbs like crush with more appropriate geographical descriptions such as reach or hit.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A mix of complex and simple structures is attempted, though agreement and pronoun errors occur repeatedly.
Ensure consistent subject-verb agreement and correct pronoun references when describing plural nouns like winds.