The diagram below shows how one type of desert, known as a rain-shadow desert, is formed.
Sample Response
The diagram illustrates the step-by-step process by which a rain-shadow desert develops.shows how one type of desert, known as a rain-shadow desert, is formed.
Overall, the process consists of several stages, beginning with winds approaching the coast and ending with dry winds reaching inland areas, where a rain-shadow desert is formed. Winds travel thousands of kilometers during this process.
Initiallynitially, winds approach the coast from the sea. Winds are pushed upwards when they are close to the windward side of mountains. Moist air rises and cools in this area, wherethis area where clouds are formed. As the air continues to rise, more clouds form near the top ofpf the mountains.Subsequently, rain falls near the top of the mountainstop of mountains. Following the rainfallMeanwhile, after the rain falls, the remaining dry air continues over the mountains and moves down the leeward side of the mountainsleeward side of mountains. Finally, dry winds reach inland areas. The rain-shadow desert is formed because no moist air reaches inland areas.
Why this response received Band 7.0
The response effectively describes all main stages of the rain-shadow desert formation process with a clear overview and accurate sequencing. The main limitation is the presence of minor typographical errors and a word count slightly below the 150-word target. Proofreading for minor typos and elaborating slightly more on key contrasting features like the windward versus leeward sides will help achieve higher scores.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
All major stages of the process are accurately identified and described, supported by a clear overview.
Expand slightly on key features, such as explicitly contrasting conditions on the windward and leeward sides, to ensure the word count exceeds the recommended minimum comfortably.
Coherence and Cohesion
Information is logically organized in chronological order using appropriate sequential linkers.
Vary cohesive devices beyond basic time markers to create even smoother transitions between process stages.
Lexical Resource
Vocabulary is well-selected and accurately conveys process terminology, though minor typographical errors are present.
Carefully proofread the text to eliminate simple spelling mistakes like missing initial letters and mistyped prepositions.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A good range of sentence structures is used accurately with strong control over passive voice and complex clauses.
Maintain this high accuracy while introducing more varied complex sentence patterns when connecting consecutive steps.
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IELTS Academic Writing Task 1
The diagram below shows how one type of desert, known as a rain-shadow desert, is formed.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.