The line graph illustrates the number of participants in different activities at a social centre in Melbourne, Australia over the 20-year period spanning from 2000 to 2020.
This response is estimated at Band 9.0. Can you write a better one?
Write yours and get clear feedback on all four criteria.
- Closest to official scores
- What to fix on each criterion
- Feedback in about 20 seconds · free
Sample Response
The line graph illustrates the number of participants in different activities at a social centre in Melbourne, Australia over the 20-year period spanning from 2000 to 2020.
Overall, participation in the film club was consistently far higher than that in all other activities, while martial arts generally held second place until it was overtaken by table tennis in 2015. The remaining three activities showed much greater variation: table tennis grew sharply in the second half of the periodtable tennis became a late riser, musical performances were newly introduced, and amateur dramatics followed a long-term downward trend.
The film club and martial arts showed the most stable attendance. Film club participation remained between 60 and 70 people overbetween 60 and 70 over the entire 20-year period. Martial arts attracted between 30 and 40 participants, with minor fluctuations across the two decades.
In contrast,On the other hand, the remaining three activities registered considerable change. Musical performances emerged as a new event in 2005, after which participation rose steadily. It overtookoutnumbered amateur dramatics in 2015, and by 2020, its participant count stood at roughly 20, about 15 fewer than attendance for martial arts.
Table tennis started with fewer than 20 participants in 2000 and experienced modest growth until 2010, when it surpassed amateur dramatics. It continued to surge in the following years and overtook martial arts in 2015, reaching over 50 participants by 2020, around 15 more than attendance for martial arts.
FinallyMeanwhile, amateur dramatics saw a slight rise in participants prior to 2005, when it hit its peak of roughly 30, before entering a sustained downward trend. After 2010, its numbers fell below those for table tennis, and from approximately 2015 onwards, it also lagged behind musical performances. By the end of the timeframe, approximately 6 peoplefewer than 10 people took part in this activity, making it the least popular of all.
Why this response received Band 9.0
The response is an exemplary Task 1 report that provides a comprehensive overview, precise detailed comparisons, and full data accuracy. Ideas are structured logically in well-defined paragraphs with smooth cohesion and advanced transitional phrases. Vocabulary and sentence structures are extremely varied, precise, and accurate throughout.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
All key trends, overall patterns, intersections, and data points from the graph are fully satisfied with complete accuracy.
Maintain this excellent analytical standard and accurate data coverage in future writing tasks.
Coherence and Cohesion
The response is logically organized with a clear overall structure, well-thought-out grouping of activities, and effortless cohesive linking.
Continue using natural referencing and cohesive devices to maintain seamless reader guidance.
Lexical Resource
A sophisticated and natural vocabulary range is displayed with precise word choice suited for statistics and trends.
Sustain the use of varied and flexible topic vocabulary while avoiding overly complex phrasing where simple terms fit.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A wide variety of complex grammatical structures is used with full flexibility, control, and faultless precision.
Keep practicing diverse sentence structures while ensuring accuracy remains consistently high under timed conditions.