The graph below shows the average monthly use of health clubs in Miami and Florida by all full-time members in 2017. The pie charts show the age profile of male and female members of this health club.
Sample Response
The bar chartinfographic representation in the form of the first bar graph illustrates the average monthly usemonthly usage of the health club by male and female membersin two cities in 2017, and the two pie charts showthe second pie chart topics the age of male and female membersmen and women members of the health club.
Overall, it can be seen that the highest usage of the health club in June was in the male category, while male use stayed around 840–860, while female use was about 710–730 from June to Augustthe number of people was approximately the same from June to August month in both categories in 2017. In the female category, health club usage was lowest in January and Februarywas lowest in December.
First of all, the highest usage of the health club in the male category was in June, with around 850 males. However, during the first two monthsstarting of the two months, male and female members were fairly similarwere approximately stable, at about 570 and 540 for men, and 500 in both months for women, respectivelyand that were 550 and 570, 500 and 500 respectively. Air scrap shows both categories were inclined till the month of June then after rapidly declined and December month show 600 man and 500 women used health club.
On the other hand, the age group of 21-45 people were the highest group in male. (55%). Notably, a quarter (25%) of male members wereof the male was in the age group of 65 or older65 and above. However, among female membersin females, the 21–45 age group accounted for 50%the 21-45 age doubled(50%) in 2017.
Why this response received Band 5.0
The response has a recognisable structure and covers both the monthly-use chart and the membership-age charts, with several accurate figures. However, its overview misses the dominant pattern that male use is higher throughout the year, includes an inaccurate claim about the female low point, and leaves much of the age data unreported. Prioritise an accurate two-part overview and select balanced comparisons from every visual.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
The response addresses both chart types and reports some correct values, but the overview contains an inaccurate low point and omits major monthly and age-profile comparisons.
Highlight that male attendance is higher in every month and that both series peak in summer, then compare all three age groups for both sexes.
Coherence and Cohesion
Information is divided into introduction, overview, monthly data, and age data, but several links and comparisons are difficult to follow.
Use one paragraph for the annual trend and one for the two age profiles, linking figures through direct comparisons rather than vague references.
Lexical Resource
Basic chart vocabulary is present, but repetition and frequent inaccurate choices such as “pie chart topics,” “Air scrap,” and “inclined” impair clarity.
Use precise expressions such as “the chart shows,” “attendance rose,” “peaked,” “declined,” and “accounted for” consistently.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Frequent errors in agreement, articles, tense, plurals, and sentence construction make several data statements difficult to decode.
Write shorter comparison sentences with explicit subjects, correct past-tense verbs, and agreement between figures and plural nouns.
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IELTS Academic Writing Task 1
The graph below shows the average monthly use of health clubs in Miami and Florida by all full-time members in 2017. The pie charts show the age profile of male and female members of this health club.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.