The pie charts below show responses by teachers of foreign languages in Britain to a survey concerning why their students are learning a foreign language. The first chart shows the main reason for learning a foreign language. The second chart shows how many teachers felt that there has been a recent change in the reason.
Sample Response
The first pie chart outlines the primary reasons for the pupil to learn a second language while the second pie chart shows the changes in these purposes based on the responses of language teachers in Britain. Generally speaking, travel, job and business are the primary objectives for students to learn a foreign language and property purchasing and maintaining social contacts are two aims which inspired an increasing number of students to learn a second language. The first pie chart reveals that almost one-third of foreign language learners in Britain enrolled in second language learning classes to be able to travel. Just over one-quarter of them learn it for professional purposes. Interestingly, 19% of them learn it to buy property overseas. Only one out of 20 students showed general interests while 14% of them aim for skill development and to maintain social contacts. The least percentage, 3% to be exact, were motivated to learn a foreign language because of their foreign partners. The second pie chart presents the ratio of a recent increase in foreign language learners in Britain and it is obvious that property-owning and career objective were the two primary reasons for this surge. 19% escalation was noted for both of these purposes. Foreign partners, self-development, travel, general interests each contributed to 3 to 6 per cent proliferation while social interaction contributed to a 15% increase of foreign language learners according to the teachers.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Use a plural noun Original: the pupil Suggested revision: pupils Why it matters: The chart concerns students generally, so the plural form is required here.
- 2. Describe reported increases Original: changes in these purposes Suggested revision: reported recent increases in these reasons Why it matters: The second chart shows teachers' reports of recent increases by reason, rather than changes in the purposes themselves.
- 3. Avoid unsupported detail Original: enrolled in second language learning classes Suggested revision: learned a foreign language Why it matters: The chart reports reasons for learning and does not state that students enrolled in classes.
- 4. Keep tense consistent Original: one-quarter of them learn it Suggested revision: one-quarter of them learned one Why it matters: Past tense matches the reporting of the survey figures, and one clearly refers to a foreign language.
- 5. Keep tense consistent Original: 19% of them learn it Suggested revision: 19% of them learned one Why it matters: Use past tense consistently when describing the survey results.
- 6. Use the chart label Original: showed general interests Suggested revision: reported general interest Why it matters: General interest is the category shown in the chart and is normally uncountable in this meaning.
- 7. Use accurate phrasing Original: The least percentage Suggested revision: The smallest proportion Why it matters: Smallest proportion is the natural expression for the lowest share in a chart.
- 8. Match the subject Original: were motivated to learn a foreign language Suggested revision: was attributed to learning a foreign language Why it matters: The singular subject percentage requires a singular verb construction.
- 9. Clarify chart measure Original: ratio of a recent increase Suggested revision: proportions reporting recent increases Why it matters: The values represent proportions of teachers who reported an increase for each reason.
- 10. Use precise category Original: property-owning Suggested revision: buying property overseas Why it matters: This wording matches the category presented in the visual.
- 11. Use chart terminology Original: career objective Suggested revision: business/work Why it matters: Business/work is the category named in the chart.
- 12. Avoid unsupported claim Original: this surge Suggested revision: the reported increase Why it matters: The visual records teachers' perceptions of recent increases rather than measuring an overall surge in learners.
Suggested Rewrites
- the pupil pupils
- changes in these purposes reported recent increases in these reasons
- enrolled in second language learning classes learned a foreign language
- one-quarter of them learn it one-quarter of them learned one
- 19% of them learn it 19% of them learned one
- showed general interests reported general interest
Why this response received Band 7.0
The response is well organised and uses a suitably varied vocabulary to describe both charts, with a clear overview of the main motives. Its main limitation is data accuracy: buying property accounts for 34% of reported increases, not 19%, and the 15% reporting no change is omitted. Prioritise checking every figure against the visual and distinguishing proportions of motives from proportions reporting recent increases.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
A clear overview and broad coverage are provided, but the second chart's leading 34% figure is misreported as 19% and the no-change category is omitted.
Check each percentage against the correct chart and explicitly include the largest value and any important unchanged category.
Coherence and Cohesion
Information progresses logically from an overview to separate descriptions of the two charts, with generally effective linking.
Make comparisons within the second-chart paragraph more direct so the relative size of the changes is immediately clear.
Lexical Resource
Vocabulary is varied and topic-appropriate, although phrases such as 'ratio of a recent increase' and 'per cent proliferation' are imprecise or unnatural.
Prefer conventional chart language such as 'the proportion reporting an increase' and 'rose by' to improve precision.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A good range of complex structures is used with mostly clear control, despite occasional agreement, article, and number errors.
Proofread noun phrases and subject-verb agreement, especially forms such as 'general interest' and 'the smallest percentage was'.
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IELTS Academic Writing Task 1
The pie charts below show responses by teachers of foreign languages in Britain to a survey concerning why their students are learning a foreign language. The first chart shows the main reason for learning a foreign language. The second chart shows how many teachers felt that there has been a recent change in the reason.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.