The diagrams below show the life cycle of the silkworm and the stages in the production of silk cloth.
Sample Response
The given pictorial show the life cycle of the silkworm and also shows the processes of silk cloth productions. The life cycle of a silkworm begins from the eggs laid by the mother worm and from these eggs the silkworm larvae are generated after 10 days. The silkworm larva usually eats leaves like mulberry leaves and completes the second stage of the life cycle in 4-6 weeks. In their third stage, they create silk thread shells and remain there for another 3 to 8 days and then create an oval cocoon. The cocoon stage lasts for around 16 days and they become moth in the final stage. With time the moths become grown-up and recycle the processes again. The second picture describes the processes of the silk cloth production which have more than 5 stages. In the initial stage, the silk thread shells of the silkworm are selected and then boiled in the next stage. After boiling in water the threads are unwinded and they are usually 300 to 900 meter long. Then these are twisted and dyed and finally, those are weaved to silks. The twisting, dying, weaving and then dying again the process is done more than once as per necessary to produce fine quality silks.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Agreement error Original: pictorial show Suggested revision: diagrams show Why it matters: A plural subject needs the base verb, and 'diagrams' is the natural noun.
- 2. Wrong noun form Original: silk cloth productions Suggested revision: silk cloth production Why it matters: Production is uncountable when naming the process.
- 3. Natural collocation Original: begins from Suggested revision: begins with Why it matters: A process normally begins with its first stage.
- 4. Inaccurate passive Original: silkworm larvae are generated Suggested revision: silkworm larvae hatch Why it matters: Larvae hatch from eggs; they are not 'generated'.
- 5. Use visual detail Original: eats leaves like mulberry leaves Suggested revision: feeds on mulberry leaves Why it matters: The diagram specifically labels mulberry leaves as food.
- 6. Stage inaccuracy Original: silk thread shells Suggested revision: silk thread Why it matters: The larva produces silk thread before a cocoon forms; the visual does not show a thread shell.
- 7. Missing article Original: become moth Suggested revision: become a moth Why it matters: Singular countable 'moth' needs an article.
- 8. Unnatural phrasing Original: moths become grown-up Suggested revision: adult moths lay eggs Why it matters: This accurately describes how the cycle restarts.
- 9. Incorrect stage count Original: more than 5 stages Suggested revision: five main stages Why it matters: The production diagram labels select, boil, unwind, twist, and weave.
- 10. Irregular participle Original: threads are unwinded Suggested revision: threads are unwound Why it matters: The past participle of unwind is 'unwound'.
- 11. Plural unit Original: 300 to 900 meter long Suggested revision: 300 to 900 metres long Why it matters: A measurement greater than one requires a plural unit.
- 12. Passive form Original: those are weaved Suggested revision: they are woven Why it matters: The correct past participle of weave is 'woven'.
Suggested Rewrites
- pictorial show diagrams show
- silk cloth productions silk cloth production
- begins from begins with
- silkworm larvae are generated silkworm larvae hatch
- eats leaves like mulberry leaves feeds on mulberry leaves
- silk thread shells silk thread
Why this response received Band 6.0
The response covers both diagrams, reports all four life-cycle timings, and follows the main production sequence. Its main weakness is accuracy and precision: it confuses the larva's silk thread with a shell, gives a vague overview, and adds unsupported repetition and quality claims. Prioritise a clear overview of the cyclical and linear processes, then use accurate process vocabulary and controlled passive forms.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Detailed feedback by IELTS writing criterion after the annotated essay.
Task Achievement
Both processes and most key timings are covered, but the overview is weak and several production details are inaccurate or unsupported.
State that one diagram is cyclical and the other is a linear five-stage process, then report only stages shown in the visuals.
Coherence and Cohesion
The description progresses from the life cycle to cloth production, though it is presented as one dense paragraph and some referencing is unclear.
Use an introduction, overview, and one paragraph for each diagram, with sequencing language that makes stage relationships explicit.
Lexical Resource
There is enough process vocabulary to communicate meaning, but frequent collocation and word-form errors reduce precision.
Use exact terms such as larvae hatch, spin silk thread, form a cocoon, unwind, twist, dye, and weave.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Meaning remains clear, but agreement, articles, plurals, passive forms, and irregular participles are often inaccurate.
Practise present-simple passive structures and check subject-verb agreement and countable nouns throughout.