The pie chart gives information on UAE government spending in 2000. The total budget was AED 315 billion.
Sample Response
The pie chart delineates how the UAE administration spent the national budget in 2000. It is obvious that social security and health and personal social services received the largest proportion of incentives from the 315 billion Dirham' national budget in this year in the United Arab Emirates. As is presented in the diagram, the UAE administration’s budget in 2000 was 315 billion Arab Emirates Dirham and 100 billion of it went on maintaining citizens’ social security. Just over 53 billion was allocated for the health and social services which was the second largest allocation by the USA government. Budget allocation for education, defence and debt interests were 38, 22 and 23 billion Dirhams respectively. Housing heritage and environment sector was allotted 15 billion Dirham which was 6 billion higher than the allocation for transportation. The UAE government shared only 9 billion Dirham, the least, for its transportation sector in 2000 while other expenditure accounted for 23 billion.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Wrong spending term Original: proportion of incentives Suggested revision: shares of expenditure Why it matters: Incentives does not describe the portions of a government budget shown in the chart.
- 2. Malformed possessive phrase Original: 315 billion Dirham' national budget Suggested revision: national budget of AED 315 billion Why it matters: The original phrase has an incorrect possessive and currency form.
- 3. Natural time phrase Original: in this year Suggested revision: that year Why it matters: That year is the natural reference to a previously stated past year.
- 4. Concise chart reference Original: As is presented Suggested revision: As shown Why it matters: As shown is a more natural way to introduce information from the chart.
- 5. Correct currency form Original: 315 billion Arab Emirates Dirham Suggested revision: AED 315 billion Why it matters: The chart expresses the total in AED, and the original currency name is malformed.
- 6. Specify the amount Original: 100 billion of it Suggested revision: AED 100 billion of this Why it matters: Adding the currency and using this makes the reference precise.
- 7. Report allocation accurately Original: went on maintaining citizens’ social security Suggested revision: was allocated to social security Why it matters: The chart shows a budget allocation and does not specify maintenance of citizens.
- 8. Use exact chart value Original: Just over 53 billion Suggested revision: AED 53 billion Why it matters: The chart labels this category as exactly AED 53 billion, not just over that amount.
- 9. Use full category Original: the health and social services Suggested revision: health and personal social services Why it matters: The chart's category includes personal social services.
- 10. Correct country name Original: USA Suggested revision: UAE Why it matters: The chart concerns the United Arab Emirates, not the United States.
- 11. Use plural subject Original: allocation Suggested revision: allocations Why it matters: Three separate allocations require a plural noun to agree with were.
- 12. Correct budget label Original: interests Suggested revision: interest Why it matters: Debt interest is the category named in the chart.
Suggested Rewrites
- proportion of incentives shares of expenditure
- 315 billion Dirham' national budget national budget of AED 315 billion
- in this year that year
- As is presented As shown
- 315 billion Arab Emirates Dirham AED 315 billion
- 100 billion of it AED 100 billion of this
Why this response received Band 6.5
The response accurately reports most major allocations and clearly identifies social security and health services as the two largest areas. Its main limitations are the omission of two smaller categories, the mistaken reference to the USA, and awkward wording within a single undeveloped paragraph. Prioritise complete category coverage, precise institutional references, and clearer paragraphing while retaining the effective use of figures and comparisons.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
A clear overview and mostly accurate figures cover the major spending areas, though law and order and industry, agriculture and employment are omitted.
Include the two omitted categories and correct the reference to the UAE government so the visual is represented completely and accurately.
Coherence and Cohesion
Information progresses logically from the largest allocations to smaller ones, but the whole report is presented as one paragraph.
Separate the overview from a grouped detail paragraph and use comparisons to connect related categories more explicitly.
Lexical Resource
Vocabulary such as allocated, allotted and accounted for shows range, although incentives, maintaining social security and shared are imprecise choices.
Use precise chart-reporting collocations, especially allocated to, expenditure on and spending category, while avoiding unsuitable synonyms.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A mix of simple and complex structures communicates the data clearly, despite recurring agreement, possessive and punctuation errors.
Check noun phrases and subject-verb agreement carefully, particularly plural allocations, currency expressions and commas in category lists.
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IELTS Academic Writing Task 1
The pie chart gives information on UAE government spending in 2000. The total budget was AED 315 billion.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.