The charts below give information on the ages of the populations of Yemen and Italy in 2000 and projections for 2050.
Sample Response
The supplied pie charts depict populations of different ages in Yemen and Italy in 2000 and give predictions for 2050 based on people’s age. In general, both countries, Yemen and Italy, are forecasted to have adolescent and adult as the vast majority of populations in 2050.
Looking at the details, in Yemen in 2000, children and teens accounted the biggest proportion of citizen, 50.1%. In contrast, senior population was the lowest proportion of population, only 3.6%. Meanwhile, young adults and adults amassed 46.3% of total population. However, it is predicted that in 2050, the number of adult population will dominate significantly the proportion of people abiding in Yemen, 57.3% and approximately 10% higher than in 2000. Vice versa, percentage of people aged 0-14 years will be decreased to 37%, about 13% lower than in 2000. Seniors will be remained as the tiniest fraction among all age categories, only 5.7% in 2002.
Meanwhile, In Italy, adult reckoned the highest 61.6% of the total citizen in 2000, followed by the elderly people's percentage which came in the second place, 24.1% and toddlers and children counted only 14.3%. In 2050, it is forecasted that adult population will still be the highest proportion, 46.2% and the number of seniors will be about 42.3%, almost twice higher than in 2000. On the other hand, children’s percentage will be declined to only 11.5%.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Use chart age group Original: adolescent and adult Suggested revision: people aged 15–59 Why it matters: The chart uses the 15–59 age category rather than separate adolescent and adult groups.
- 2. Fix population phrase Original: the vast majority of populations Suggested revision: the majority of each population Why it matters: Each country has one population, so the singular distributive form is required.
- 3. Add required preposition Original: accounted the biggest Suggested revision: accounted for the largest Why it matters: The verb phrase is 'accounted for', and 'largest' is the natural term for a proportion.
- 4. Use population term Original: proportion of citizen Suggested revision: proportion of the population Why it matters: The statistic describes the whole population rather than one citizen.
- 5. Describe a share Original: the lowest proportion of population Suggested revision: the smallest proportion of the population Why it matters: A proportion is normally described as smallest, with the definite article before population.
- 6. Use proportion verb Original: amassed 46.3% Suggested revision: made up 46.3% Why it matters: 'Made up' accurately describes the share represented by an age group.
- 7. Use accurate contrast Original: Vice versa Suggested revision: By contrast Why it matters: 'Vice versa' implies a reversed relationship, whereas this sentence simply contrasts two trends.
- 8. Use active future Original: will be decreased Suggested revision: will decrease Why it matters: The age-group proportion decreases; the passive form is ungrammatical here.
- 9. Use percentage points Original: about 13% lower Suggested revision: 13.1 percentage points lower Why it matters: The change from 50.1% to 37.0% is a difference of 13.1 percentage points.
- 10. Remove passive form Original: will be remained Suggested revision: will remain Why it matters: 'Remain' is intransitive and cannot be used in this passive construction.
- 11. Use formal comparison Original: the tiniest fraction Suggested revision: the smallest proportion Why it matters: 'Smallest proportion' is the precise formal wording for chart data.
- 12. Correct projection year Original: 2002 Suggested revision: 2050 Why it matters: The 5.7% figure belongs to the 2050 projection, not 2002.
Suggested Rewrites
- adolescent and adult people aged 15–59
- the vast majority of populations the majority of each population
- accounted the biggest accounted for the largest
- proportion of citizen proportion of the population
- the lowest proportion of population the smallest proportion of the population
- amassed 46.3% made up 46.3%
Why this response received Band 6.5
The response reports almost all percentages accurately and organizes the details clearly by country. Its main limitation is an imprecise overview that misses the contrasting age profiles and Italy’s pronounced ageing, while recurring collocation and grammatical errors reduce control. Prioritize a sharper comparative overview, then edit noun forms, articles, agreement, and passive constructions so the accurate data is expressed more naturally.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
The response accurately covers nearly all figures and main changes, but the overview is vague and the Yemen projection is once mislabeled as 2002.
State the central contrast explicitly: Yemen remains comparatively young, whereas Italy’s elderly share rises sharply and approaches its working-age share.
Coherence and Cohesion
The introduction, overview, and country-based detail paragraphs create clear progression, although some linking expressions are mechanical or misused.
Use simpler, accurate transitions and make each comparison follow directly from the preceding figure.
Lexical Resource
There is sufficient range for describing proportions and projections, but frequent awkward choices such as “amassed,” “abiding,” and “adult reckoned” weaken precision.
Prefer standard Task 1 collocations such as “accounted for,” “comprised,” “was projected to rise,” and “the working-age population.”
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A mix of sentence forms conveys the meaning clearly, but article, plural, agreement, and passive-form errors recur throughout.
Review countable nouns and avoid incorrect passives such as “will be remained” and “will be declined.”
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IELTS Academic Writing Task 1
The charts below give information on the ages of the populations of Yemen and Italy in 2000 and projections for 2050.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.