You are going to study at a college in the UK next year. You would like to stay in the college Hall of Residence. Write a letter to the college. In your letter: - outline what your room needs are - outline what your food needs are - ask what alternatives are available if the college cannot provide what you want
Sample Response
Dear Sir or Madam, I have recently enrolled in your college and my class will commence at the beginning of next year. I am writing to request you to arrange my accommodation in the college hostel or suggest an alternative. My major is 'Economics' and my class will start in August 2025. I will travel from Japan would prefer to stay in the college residence hall. I would like a single room either on the second or third floor with the air-conditioner and laundry facilities. My first preference is to stay at the college hostel. I am a vegetarian and would like to know if our college canteen is vegetarian-friendly. If this is not included in the dining room, would you please inform me if I can avail myself vegetarian diets from a nearby restaurant? If so, how far those restaurants are? If no suitable room is available in the college hall, would you please suggest to me a suitable place to stay in the vicinity of the college? I can share the room with another student and would be ready to pay higher, but the air-conditioner, vegetarian-friendly meals and laundry service are indispensable as they are the foremost factors I am considering now. Looking forward to getting a reply from you. Yours faithfully, Johnny Quan
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Correct college preposition Original: in Suggested revision: at Why it matters: Students enrol 'at' an institution in this context.
- 2. Name the course Original: my class will commence Suggested revision: my course will begin Why it matters: A course, rather than a single class, begins at the start of the academic year.
- 3. Correct request pattern Original: request you to arrange Suggested revision: request that you arrange Why it matters: The formal verb 'request' takes a that-clause in this construction.
- 4. Match residence term Original: accommodation in the college hostel Suggested revision: accommodation in the college hall of residence Why it matters: Using the prompt's term makes the requested accommodation type unambiguous.
- 5. Remove unnecessary quotes Original: 'Economics' Suggested revision: Economics Why it matters: A field of study does not require quotation marks here.
- 6. Use course consistently Original: class Suggested revision: course Why it matters: 'Course' consistently refers to the programme of study rather than one lesson.
- 7. Request air conditioning Original: with the air-conditioner Suggested revision: with air conditioning Why it matters: 'Air conditioning' names the room facility, whereas 'the air-conditioner' suggests a specific appliance.
- 8. Use formal reference Original: our Suggested revision: the Why it matters: The neutral article suits a formal enquiry to an institution the writer has not yet joined.
- 9. Use question word order Original: how far those restaurants are? Suggested revision: how far away are those restaurants? Why it matters: A direct question requires inversion between the verb and subject.
- 10. Correct suggest pattern Original: suggest to me a suitable place Suggested revision: suggest a suitable place Why it matters: 'Suggest' takes the proposed option directly without 'to me' in this structure.
- 11. Use indefinite article Original: the Suggested revision: a Why it matters: No specific shared room has yet been identified, so the indefinite article is required.
- 12. Correct payment phrase Original: higher Suggested revision: more Why it matters: 'Higher' modifies a noun such as a fee, while 'more' can stand after 'pay.'
Suggested Rewrites
- in at
- my class will commence my course will begin
- request you to arrange request that you arrange
- accommodation in the college hostel accommodation in the college hall of residence
- 'Economics' Economics
- class course
Why this response received Band 6.5
The letter addresses every requirement with useful specificity about the room, vegetarian food, and possible alternatives, and its requests remain appropriately courteous. Its main weaknesses are the unbroken block of text and frequent grammatical or collocational problems, including a fused sentence and malformed indirect questions. The priority is to divide the content by bullet point and edit each request into accurate formal English.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
All three bullet points are covered in detail, the accommodation purpose is clear, and the tone is suitably polite despite some unnecessary repetition.
Remove repeated preference statements and present the acceptable shared-room alternative more directly alongside the essential facilities.
Coherence and Cohesion
The content follows a broadly logical order from room needs to food needs and alternatives, but the absence of paragraphing makes the letter dense and less easy to navigate.
Use separate paragraphs for the opening purpose, room requirements, dietary requirements, alternatives, and closing.
Lexical Resource
The response has enough range for accommodation and dietary requests, but several combinations such as ‘avail myself vegetarian diets’ and ‘pay higher’ are inaccurate.
Use natural request language such as ‘obtain vegetarian meals’, ‘pay a higher rent’, and ‘air conditioning’.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Both simple and complex forms are attempted, but sentence-boundary, article, preposition, and question-formation errors recur while meaning remains generally clear.
Correct the fused sentence after ‘Japan’ and use proper indirect-question order, such as ‘how far the restaurants are’.
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IELTS General Training Writing Task 1
You are going to study at a college in the UK next year. You would like to stay in the college Hall of Residence. Write a letter to the college. In your letter:
- outline what your room needs are
- outline what your food needs are
- ask what alternatives are available if the college cannot provide what you want
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.