You travelled by a long-distance bus recently and your suitcase was damaged. Write a letter to the bus company. In your letter: - inform the bus company of when and to where you travelled - describe your suitcase and what happened to it - explain why the company should pay for a new suitcase
Sample Response
Dear Sir or Madam, I am Sameed Qureshi, a loyal customer of your bus service, writing to bring your attention to property damage while travelling by one of your buses from Hamburg to Frankfurt on 24th February 2025. I am hoping to receive compensation for the damage and would expect you to issue a show-cause letter to the person responsible. Regarding the incident, I took a bus (number BT5801) on 24th February 2025 and the bus left the Hamburg Central Bus Station at 7:30 am. Like most travellers, I submitted my suitcase to a bus staff who kept it in the luggage compartment. When the bus arrived at the Frankfurt terminal, I was shocked to discover that my suitcase was severely damaged. It was a maroon suitcase that my dad has given me as a present. Hence it has a sentimental value to me. It is an expensive suitcase made by Briggs & Riley company. Since I have submitted the suitcase to one of your employees before embarking on this journey, I expect you to reimburse me the amount equivalent to the fair value of my suitcase. Please find the enclosed purchase receipt of the suitcase. I have already decided that if you fail to pay me for my loss within the next 14 days, I shall institute legal proceedings against your company in a small claims court. I am anticipating immediate remedial action. Yours faithfully, Sameed Qureshi
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Correct expression Original: bring your attention to property damage Suggested revision: bring to your attention the damage to my suitcase Why it matters: The fixed expression is "bring something to someone's attention," and naming the suitcase is more precise.
- 2. Fix count noun phrase Original: submitted my suitcase to a bus staff Suggested revision: handed my suitcase to a member of the bus staff Why it matters: "Staff" is a collective noun here, so one employee should be called a member of staff.
- 3. Use earlier past tense Original: has Suggested revision: had Why it matters: The gift occurred before the past journey, so the past perfect makes the sequence clear.
- 4. Remove unnecessary article Original: Hence it has a sentimental value Suggested revision: Therefore, it has sentimental value Why it matters: "Sentimental value" is uncountable in this meaning and does not take the article "a".
- 5. Remove redundant noun Original: made by Briggs & Riley company Suggested revision: made by Briggs & Riley Why it matters: The company name already identifies the manufacturer, so "company" is unnecessary.
- 6. Use correct past tense Original: Since I have submitted the suitcase Suggested revision: Since I handed over the suitcase Why it matters: The handover was a completed event on the past journey, so the present perfect is inappropriate.
- 7. Use correct preposition Original: of Suggested revision: for Why it matters: A receipt is conventionally described as being "for" the item purchased.
- 8. Use natural closing Original: I am anticipating immediate remedial action Suggested revision: I look forward to your prompt response Why it matters: This gives the formal complaint a more natural and appropriately courteous closing request.
- 9. Use natural introduction Original: I am Sameed Qureshi Suggested revision: My name is Sameed Qureshi Why it matters: This is a more natural way to identify oneself at the start of a formal complaint.
- 10. Use neutral description Original: loyal Suggested revision: regular Why it matters: "Regular customer" states the relevant relationship more neutrally in a formal complaint.
- 11. Remove unnecessary aside Original: Like most travellers, Suggested revision: Delete Why it matters: This comparison does not help explain what happened to the writer's suitcase.
- 12. Describe handling precisely Original: kept Suggested revision: placed Why it matters: "Placed it" describes the employee's action more precisely than "kept it".
Suggested Rewrites
- bring your attention to property damage bring to your attention the damage to my suitcase
- submitted my suitcase to a bus staff handed my suitcase to a member of the bus staff
- has had
- Hence it has a sentimental value Therefore, it has sentimental value
- made by Briggs & Riley company made by Briggs & Riley
- Since I have submitted the suitcase Since I handed over the suitcase
Why this response received Band 7.0
The complaint has a clear purpose, supplies precise journey and suitcase details, and presents a persuasive basis for compensation in a suitably formal style. Its principal limitation is that the physical damage itself is only labelled severe rather than described, while some legalistic wording and inaccurate collocations sound unnatural. Describe the actual damage and use more measured, idiomatic complaint language to strengthen credibility.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
The journey, suitcase, and case for compensation are all addressed clearly, but the nature of the damage is insufficiently specified.
State exactly what was damaged, such as a broken wheel, torn shell, or unusable zip, and keep the requested remedy firm but proportionate.
Coherence and Cohesion
The response progresses logically from the incident to the suitcase's value, the compensation claim, and a concluding deadline.
Use distinct paragraphs for the incident, justification, and requested resolution to sharpen the organisation.
Lexical Resource
The letter demonstrates a broad formal vocabulary, though several choices are overly legalistic or collocationally inaccurate.
Prefer natural phrases such as bring the damage to your attention, handed my suitcase to a staff member, and compensate me for its value.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A range of complex structures communicates the complaint clearly, but article, tense, and noun-form errors occur in several sentences.
Improve control of countable nouns and narrative tense, particularly in references to staff, the company name, and handing over the suitcase.
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IELTS General Training Writing Task 1
You travelled by a long-distance bus recently and your suitcase was damaged. Write a letter to the bus company. In your letter:
- inform the bus company of when and to where you travelled
- describe your suitcase and what happened to it
- explain why the company should pay for a new suitcase
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.