A friend who lives in a different city has invited you to his/her daughter's 8th birthday. However, you can not accept the invitation due to some personal reasons. Write a letter to this friend. In your letter: - thank him/her for the invitation - mention why you can not attend the birthday party - offer to meet him/her some other day
Sample Response
Dear Wilson, It was great to hear from you, and I’m really surprised that Diana has already turned eight! It sounds as if she has grown so fast. I wish her a happy birthday and thank you for inviting me to this special occasion. I'd love to be at Diana's birthday party but I’m terribly sorry that I can't make it due to some deadlines at my office next week. The problem is that I’ve been promoted to the assistant manager position a few months ago and the work pressure has skyrocketed since then. The office management has assured me that I'll be given an assistant soon but until that happens, I'll hardly have time for myself. Perhaps I can visit you sometime next summer when I hope I'll stay with you for a couple of days. Please share some birthday photos on Facebook so that I get a glimpse of the celebration. I owe Diana a birthday gift. Anyway, I must finish today. So thanks once again for your kind invitation, and I do hope that we can get together sometime in the summer. Warm wishes, Harris
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Add comma Original: birthday party but Suggested revision: birthday party, but Why it matters: A comma is needed before "but" when it joins two independent clauses.
- 2. Use natural phrasing Original: some deadlines at my office Suggested revision: several deadlines at work Why it matters: This wording expresses the work commitment more naturally and precisely.
- 3. Use simple past Original: I’ve been promoted Suggested revision: I was promoted Why it matters: The definite past-time phrase "a few months ago" requires the simple past.
- 4. Improve job title phrase Original: the Suggested revision: an Why it matters: The indefinite article is more natural when introducing the new position.
- 5. Add comma Original: soon but Suggested revision: soon, but Why it matters: A comma is needed before "but" when it joins two independent clauses.
- 6. Coordinate the plans Original: when I hope I'll stay with you for a couple of days Suggested revision: and stay with you for a couple of days Why it matters: Coordinating the two planned actions avoids the illogical time clause.
- 7. Add modal verb Original: so that I get a glimpse Suggested revision: so that I can get a glimpse Why it matters: "Can" correctly expresses the intended opportunity created by sharing the photos.
- 8. Remove loose connector Original: So thanks once again Suggested revision: Thanks once again Why it matters: The connector "So" is unnecessary in this closing sentence.
- 9. Sentence rewrite Original: Anyway, I must finish today. Suggested revision: Anyway, I must finish here for today. Why it matters: Adding "here" makes this informal closing expression complete and natural.
- 10. Separate key stages Suggested revision: Use short paragraphs for thanking your friend, explaining the work conflict, proposing the summer visit, and closing the letter. Why it matters: Paragraph breaks would make the three required communicative purposes easier to identify.
Suggested Rewrites
- birthday party but birthday party, but
- some deadlines at my office several deadlines at work
- I’ve been promoted I was promoted
- the an
- soon but soon, but
- when I hope I'll stay with you for a couple of days and stay with you for a couple of days
Why this response received Band 7.5
The letter handles the refusal warmly and convincingly, covering every requested point with a clear explanation and flexible, expressive language. Its main weakness is the single-block presentation, alongside a few tense and phrasing slips; the highest-priority improvement is to separate the thanks, reason, and alternative visit into logical paragraphs while correcting time references such as the promotion sentence.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Detailed feedback by IELTS writing criterion after the annotated essay.
Task Achievement
The response thanks the friend, gives a convincing and well-developed reason for declining, and proposes a later visit in a consistently warm tone.
Make the alternative arrangement more actionable by suggesting a narrower period or asking which dates next summer would suit the friend.
Coherence and Cohesion
The message progresses naturally through thanks, explanation, and a future meeting, but the absence of paragraph breaks limits clarity.
Create separate paragraphs for the invitation response, the work-related reason, and the proposed summer visit.
Lexical Resource
Vocabulary is flexible, precise, and natural, with effective expressions such as "work pressure has skyrocketed" and "a glimpse of the celebration."
Refine the few less natural phrases, for example replacing "I must finish today" with "I must finish here for now."
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A wide range of structures is handled accurately overall, with only occasional tense and phrasing errors that do not impede meaning.
Match verb tense to finished time references by writing "I was promoted a few months ago" rather than using the present perfect.
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IELTS General Training Writing Task 1
A friend who lives in a different city has invited you to his/her daughter's 8th birthday. However, you can not accept the invitation due to some personal reasons. Write a letter to this friend. In your letter:
- thank him/her for the invitation
- mention why you can not attend the birthday party
- offer to meet him/her some other day
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.