As part of a student social survey project, you are organising a group to visit a historical exhibition in a small town. Write a letter asking for information about the exhibition. In your letter: - ask about the contents of the exhibition - ask for its opening and closing dates - ask whether any discounts are available
Sample Response
Dear Sir or Madam, I am administering a group of pupils to visit the historical exhibition in Shaftesbury, UK next month. This tour will be a part of our school activities to encourage young students to participate in social surveys and grow their interest in history. I would really appreciate it if you could forward me some information regarding the exhibition. First of all, when the exhibition will be held and what are the daily opening hours? Secondly, is the exhibition suitable for the fourth and fifth graders? Please notify me about the theme and exhibited objects on display. This would help me better explain to my students the content during our trip. Finally, what are the other activities being held in connection with the exhibition? I am planning to bring over twenty students to the exhibition. So I would like to inquire whether we are eligible for any discount on entrance tickets. If there is no general discount, could you please arrange one for students? Thank you in advance. I look forward to hearing from you soon. Yours faithfully, Sarah Johnson
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Use organise a visit Original: administering a group of pupils to visit Suggested revision: organising a visit for a group of pupils to Why it matters: Administering does not naturally describe leading a group visit.
- 2. Remove unnecessary article Original: be a part of our school activities Suggested revision: be part of our school activities Why it matters: Part of is the standard expression when describing inclusion in a programme.
- 3. Use develop interest Original: grow Suggested revision: develop Why it matters: Develop is the natural verb for increasing someone's interest in a subject.
- 4. Use send information Original: forward Suggested revision: send Why it matters: Forward usually means passing on an existing message, whereas send fits this request.
- 5. Use grade modifiers Original: the fourth and fifth graders Suggested revision: fourth- and fifth-grade pupils Why it matters: The compound grade levels need hyphens when they modify pupils.
- 6. Request information naturally Original: notify Suggested revision: tell Why it matters: Tell me about is natural when requesting descriptive information about an exhibition.
- 7. Remove duplicated display wording Original: theme and exhibited objects on display Suggested revision: theme and objects on display Why it matters: Exhibited and on display repeat the same meaning.
- 8. Request a student discount Original: arrange one for students Suggested revision: offer a student discount Why it matters: Offer a discount is the natural collocation for this pricing request.
- 9. Sentence rewrite Original: First of all, when the exhibition will be held and what are the daily opening hours? Suggested revision: First, could you tell me the exhibition's opening and closing dates and its daily opening hours? Why it matters: The rewrite corrects the question structure and explicitly requests both dates required by the task.
- 10. Group the questions Suggested revision: Use separate short paragraphs for exhibition contents, dates and hours, and ticket discounts. Why it matters: Grouping each requested topic would help the recipient answer every question efficiently.
Suggested Rewrites
- administering a group of pupils to visit organising a visit for a group of pupils to
- be a part of our school activities be part of our school activities
- grow develop
- forward send
- the fourth and fifth graders fourth- and fifth-grade pupils
- notify tell
Why this response received Band 7.0
The letter has a clear purpose, maintains an appropriately polite tone, and addresses the exhibition content, timing, suitability, and group discount with useful supporting detail. Its main limitation is presentation: all ideas appear in one dense paragraph, while several awkward word choices and question structures reduce naturalness. The highest-priority improvement is to divide the requests into logical paragraphs and phrase each question more idiomatically and accurately.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
The purpose is clear, all three required areas are addressed, and the requests are developed with relevant details in an appropriate formal tone.
Ask explicitly for both the opening and closing dates to make coverage of the timing requirement completely precise.
Coherence and Cohesion
The requests progress logically through clear sequencing, but presenting the entire letter as one paragraph weakens organisation and readability.
Separate the introduction, exhibition enquiries, discount request, and closing into distinct functional paragraphs.
Lexical Resource
Vocabulary is sufficiently varied and generally precise, although phrases such as administering a group and grow their interest sound unnatural.
Use more idiomatic collocations, such as organising a group and developing their interest in history.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A range of sentence forms is used with generally good control, and the few structural errors do not impede meaning.
Improve question formation, especially by using either a direct question or a correctly structured indirect question consistently.
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IELTS General Training Writing Task 1
As part of a student social survey project, you are organising a group to visit a historical exhibition in a small town. Write a letter asking for information about the exhibition. In your letter:
- ask about the contents of the exhibition
- ask for its opening and closing dates
- ask whether any discounts are available
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.