You have received a letter from your bank asking you to acknowledge receipt of a new bank card. However, the card was missing from the envelope. Write a letter to the bank’s head office. In your letter: - explain why you are writing - express concern about the missing card - ask them what they intend to do
Sample Response
Dear Sir,
I am writing to inform you that I have recently received a letter from your bank, and an envelope which was supposed to contain my new bank card. Unfortunately, there was no card in the envelope when I opened it. I hope you will look into this issue.
First and foremost, my saving account pertains to this card, and my account number is ANBCJHH. Immediately after this occurrence, I telephoned customer care to explain this problem, but I could not get through to the right department, even though I was waiting in line for half an hour that I was extremely annoying.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Address unknown recipient Original: Dear Sir, Suggested revision: Dear Sir or Madam, Why it matters: This salutation is more suitable when writing to an unspecified person at the head office.
- 2. Clarify the connection Original: and an envelope which Suggested revision: together with an envelope that Why it matters: The revision links the letter and envelope more smoothly and clearly.
- 3. Name the problem Original: look into this issue Suggested revision: investigate the missing card Why it matters: The specific wording makes the requested response clearer.
- 4. Use a relevant transition Original: First and foremost Suggested revision: Regarding my account Why it matters: This transition introduces the account details without implying a sequence that is never continued.
- 5. Correct account term Original: saving Suggested revision: savings Why it matters: Savings account is the standard term for this type of bank account.
- 6. Use correct collocation Original: pertains to this card Suggested revision: is linked to this card Why it matters: An account is linked to a card rather than pertaining to it.
- 7. Sentence rewrite Original: Immediately after this occurrence, I telephoned customer care to explain this problem, but I could not get through to the right department, even though I was waiting in line for half an hour that I was extremely annoying. Suggested revision: Immediately after discovering the problem, I telephoned customer service, but I waited on hold for half an hour without reaching the correct department, which was extremely frustrating. Why it matters: The rewrite corrects the broken clause structure and uses the adjective for the writer's feeling.
- 8. Cover both missing points Suggested revision: Add one sentence explaining why the missing card concerns you and another asking what action the bank intends to take. Why it matters: The response does not yet express the required concern or ask the bank about its intended action.
- 9. Complete the letter Suggested revision: Add a polite closing request and an appropriate formal sign-off after this paragraph. Why it matters: The response ends abruptly without closing the correspondence.
Suggested Rewrites
- Dear Sir, Dear Sir or Madam,
- and an envelope which together with an envelope that
- look into this issue investigate the missing card
- First and foremost Regarding my account
- saving savings
- pertains to this card is linked to this card
Why this response received Band 5.5
The letter clearly identifies the missing card and gives relevant account and contact details, with some effective formal vocabulary and several controlled sentences. However, it is substantially under length, ends abruptly, and does not adequately express the security concern or ask what action the bank intends to take. The priority is to complete every bullet point in a properly concluded letter, then proofread the final long sentence for clarity.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
The reason for writing is clear, but the short, unfinished letter gives limited concern and does not directly ask what action the bank intends to take.
Add a developed security concern, request specific information about the bank's next steps, and finish with an appropriate closing.
Coherence and Cohesion
The two paragraphs follow a broadly logical sequence, but the response is too brief to sustain progression and the final sentence becomes poorly connected.
Use separate paragraphs for the problem, security concern, and requested action, with a concise closing paragraph.
Lexical Resource
There is sufficient formal vocabulary for the topic, but choices such as 'my saving account pertains to this card' and 'I was extremely annoying' are inaccurate.
Choose precise natural expressions such as 'the card is linked to my savings account' and 'the wait was extremely frustrating.'
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Several complex sentences are accurate, but the final sentence contains faulty clause linkage and a form that distorts the intended meaning.
Split the final sentence and write, for example, that the half-hour wait was extremely annoying rather than describing yourself as annoying.
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IELTS General Training Writing Task 1
You have received a letter from your bank asking you to acknowledge receipt of a new bank card. However, the card was missing from the envelope. Write a letter to the bank’s head office. In your letter:
- explain why you are writing
- express concern about the missing card
- ask them what they intend to do
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.