You work for an international company, and would like to spend six months working in its head office in another country. Write a letter to your manager. In your letter: - explain why you want to work in the company’s head office for six months - say how your work could be done while you are away - ask for his/her help in arranging it
Sample Response
Dear Mr George, I am writing to express my interest in working at our company headquarters in the United Kingdom for a few months to further enhance my skills and get exposure to the global market trends of our products so that I can better contribute to my company and carry out my responsibilities more efficiently. As you know, I have been recently promoted to the assistant product manager post and I am working hard to collaborate with my team to enhance the sales and increase our brand reputation. However, I have been feeling the need to meet and work with our global team members and attend some training sessions that our head office in London arranges frequently. I am quite positive that the opportunity to work in our company’s head office for six months will further enhance my knowledge, and give me fabulous exposure to the global market trend. I have talked to Julian and he has agreed to take up my responsibilities during my absence. Furthermore, I will check my emails daily, and be available for emergency phone calls. Once I get back to the office, I would endeavour to work extra hours in order to catch up on anything I had missed. Finally, I would need your support to get approval so that I can work in our company’s head office for six months and fulfil the objectives. I look forward to your positive reply. Yours sincerely, Charles Hugo
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Use exact duration Original: a few months Suggested revision: six months Why it matters: The task requests a six-month placement, and this wording conflicts with the duration stated later.
- 2. Improve collocation Original: get Suggested revision: gain Why it matters: “Gain exposure to” is the more natural professional collocation.
- 3. Place adverb naturally Original: have been recently promoted Suggested revision: have recently been promoted Why it matters: The adverb normally comes between the auxiliary and past participle here.
- 4. Use natural job term Original: post Suggested revision: position Why it matters: “Position” is more natural than “post” after this full job title.
- 5. Correct sales collocation Original: enhance the sales Suggested revision: increase sales Why it matters: Sales are normally increased rather than enhanced.
- 6. Correct reputation collocation Original: increase our brand reputation Suggested revision: enhance our brand's reputation Why it matters: A reputation is enhanced, while sales are increased.
- 7. Use natural verb Original: arranges frequently Suggested revision: holds regularly Why it matters: An office more naturally holds training sessions regularly.
- 8. Match formal register Original: fabulous Suggested revision: valuable Why it matters: “Valuable” is more precise and professional in a request to a manager.
- 9. Correct future viewpoint Original: anything I had missed Suggested revision: anything I may have missed Why it matters: The catching up will happen in the future, so the past perfect is inappropriate.
- 10. Organise the request Suggested revision: Divide the letter into clear paragraphs for the placement reasons, work-cover arrangements, and request for managerial support. Why it matters: The single continuous paragraph makes the three required parts harder to locate.
Suggested Rewrites
- a few months six months
- get gain
- have been recently promoted have recently been promoted
- post position
- enhance the sales increase sales
- increase our brand reputation enhance our brand's reputation
Why this response received Band 7.5
The letter fully addresses the request with a clear purpose, relevant reasons for the placement, and a practical plan for covering responsibilities, while maintaining an appropriately professional tone. Its main limitation is that the presentation is dense and several expressions are slightly repetitive or unnatural; the highest-priority improvement is to divide the response into clear functional paragraphs and tighten collocations.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
The purpose is immediately clear, all three bullet points are covered with relevant detail, and the professional register suits a manager.
Make the requested managerial help more specific by stating exactly which approval or arrangements the manager should facilitate.
Coherence and Cohesion
Ideas progress logically from reasons to cover arrangements and the final request, but the letter is presented as one dense block.
Use separate paragraphs for the rationale, absence arrangements, and request so each communicative function is easier to follow.
Lexical Resource
The vocabulary is varied and generally precise, although phrases such as 'enhance the sales' and repeated references to 'exposure' sound slightly unnatural.
Refine collocations and avoid repetition, for example by using 'increase sales' and varying references to professional experience.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A wide range of complex structures is used with strong control, and the few punctuation or phrasing lapses do not impede meaning.
Shorten the heavily extended opening sentence and review comma placement to make the syntax more controlled and readable.
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IELTS General Training Writing Task 1
You work for an international company, and would like to spend six months working in its head office in another country. Write a letter to your manager. In your letter:
- explain why you want to work in the company’s head office for six months
- say how your work could be done while you are away
- ask for his/her help in arranging it
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.