Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Advertising can tell you a lot about a country.
Sample Response
Advertising is the best marketing policy of selling goods all around the world. It is commonly seen that multinational companies use different ways of advertising their products to increase their sale. It is agreed that advertising tells a lot about a country. In the following paragraphs, I will explain my point of views.
Firstly, most of the countries use their cultural way to advertise their goods and services. For instance, in Pakistan Junaid's Kurta house, a clothing company, advertises their dresses in a cultural way, which is called Kurta. This makes it clear that the cultural dress of Pakistan is kurta, which is usually used on several occasions. As this shows that advertising can tell and show you a lot about a country.
In addition, some companies advertise imported products from different countries, which can tell you a lot about the country itself. For example, in china noodle is their national food and if look at the noodle advertisement you will see a person eating noodles with two sticks though it is really hard for other countries’ people to eat with sticks. This makes it clear that eating noodles with sticks are Chinese brand while other countries people use folks. As this shows that you can judge a country by watching their advertisements.
To sum up, the above statement, advertising clothes, food, services or any other product can be easily understandable that what the people of that country commonly use. It has been proven that you can tell about a country through watching their advertisement. Thus, it is recommended that keep advertising and keep cultural aspects alive.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Use natural collocation Original: marketing policy of selling goods Suggested revision: marketing method for selling goods Why it matters: Advertising is a method or strategy rather than a policy “of selling” goods.
- 2. Use plural noun Original: sale Suggested revision: sales Why it matters: “Sales” is the standard plural noun for the amount of products sold.
- 3. Fix noun number Original: views Suggested revision: view Why it matters: The fixed expression is singular after “my.”
- 4. Use precise phrase Original: cultural dress of Pakistan Suggested revision: traditional dress in Pakistan Why it matters: “Traditional dress” is the natural term for clothing associated with a culture.
- 5. Use clothing verb Original: used Suggested revision: worn Why it matters: Clothing is “worn,” not “used,” on occasions.
- 6. Remove faulty subordinator Original: As this shows that advertising Suggested revision: This shows that advertising Why it matters: “As” leaves this statement as a dependent fragment.
- 7. Remove repetition Original: tell and show you Suggested revision: tell you Why it matters: “Tell” and “show” repeat the same function in this clause.
- 8. Clarify cultural claim Original: eating noodles with sticks are Chinese brand Suggested revision: eating noodles with chopsticks is associated with Chinese culture Why it matters: The gerund phrase takes a singular verb, and “brand” does not express a cultural association.
- 9. Fix possessive structure Original: other countries people Suggested revision: people in other countries Why it matters: The prepositional phrase correctly identifies where the people are from.
- 10. Correct word choice Original: folks Suggested revision: forks Why it matters: “Folks” means people; the intended eating utensil is “forks.”
- 11. Remove faulty subordinator Original: As this shows that you Suggested revision: This shows that you Why it matters: Removing “As” turns the fragment into a complete sentence.
- 12. Fix pronoun agreement Original: watching their advertisements Suggested revision: viewing its advertisements Why it matters: The singular noun “a country” requires the singular possessive pronoun “its.”
Suggested Rewrites
- marketing policy of selling goods marketing method for selling goods
- sale sales
- views view
- cultural dress of Pakistan traditional dress in Pakistan
- used worn
- As this shows that advertising This shows that advertising
Why this response received Band 5.5
The essay’s strongest feature is its clear agreement and consistent attempt to link advertising with cultural clothing and food practices. Its main limitation is uneven development: both examples repeat the claim rather than fully explaining what reliable information advertising reveals, and frequent grammar and word-choice errors sometimes strain meaning; the highest-priority improvement is to build one precise explanation from each example and edit every sentence for complete structure.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
The response maintains a clear position and offers two relevant cultural examples, but the explanations are repetitive and some generalisations are insufficiently qualified.
Explain exactly what an advertisement reveals about values, customs, or consumer behaviour and acknowledge that one advertisement may not represent an entire country.
Coherence and Cohesion
The essay follows a recognizable introduction–body–conclusion structure, though repeated “This shows” fragments and mechanical linking limit progression.
Use one clear topic sentence and one concluding inference per body paragraph, eliminating repeated restatements of the thesis.
Lexical Resource
Vocabulary is adequate for the topic, but errors such as “increase their sale,” “cultural way,” “two sticks,” and “folks” frequently reduce precision.
Use “increase sales,” “culturally specific imagery,” “chopsticks,” and “forks,” while avoiding repeated broad terms.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Frequent errors in agreement, articles, plurals, capitalization, clause construction, and sentence fragments sometimes make ideas difficult to follow.
Rewrite each example with complete sentences and check forms such as “most countries use,” “if you look,” and “eating noodles with chopsticks is.”
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Advertising can tell you a lot about a country.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.