Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Advertising can tell you a lot about a country.
Sample Response
An advertisement is a branch of mass communication that provides information about the products and services offered by different companies as well as about country for its culture, society and geography. In my opinion apart from boosting the economy, it puts a multidimensional description of that area. I do agree that advertisement narrates much useful description about that region. In modern era advertisement is a necessary tool to sell the products. Apart from its utility in energising the sale of products, it has a lot other benefits. Just observing the advertisements for few days one can estimate the amount of business, social norms, costumes, levels of education, language and history of a certain population group or of a nation. Involvement of any sports star in advertisement tells us it is the favourite sports of this Nation. Fashion magazines highlight garments that are vague in that society. Shooting of scenes is shown in background of historical places, hill-stations and tourist places. These clips provide information about those places. Few advertisements are made only for the sake of promoting business. Actors are paid high for international tours and shooting is performed on world renowned places. The information in this strategy is mostly exaggerated and tried to be linked with culture and social norms of the community. In conclusion, an advertisement is a source of knowledge to a person living there and also to people who are seeing it from other countries. This subgroup of mass communication is a good tool to get useful information about a particular country.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Use possessive noun Original: as well as about country for its culture Suggested revision: as well as about a country's culture Why it matters: A singular count noun needs a determiner, and the possessive form correctly links the culture to the country.
- 2. Add article and comma Original: In modern era advertisement Suggested revision: In the modern era, advertising Why it matters: The time phrase needs the definite article and a following comma, while ‘advertising’ names the activity generally.
- 3. Use natural collocation Original: energising the sale of products Suggested revision: boosting product sales Why it matters: ‘Boosting sales’ is the standard collocation for increasing commercial activity.
- 4. Add required preposition Original: a lot other benefits Suggested revision: a lot of other benefits Why it matters: The quantifier ‘a lot’ requires ‘of’ before a noun phrase.
- 5. Show the means Original: Just Suggested revision: By Why it matters: ‘By’ correctly introduces the method through which the estimate is made.
- 6. Correct article use Original: the advertisements for few days Suggested revision: advertisements for a few days Why it matters: General plural reference needs no definite article, while ‘few days’ requires ‘a’ in the intended meaning.
- 7. Correct the word Original: costumes Suggested revision: customs Why it matters: ‘Customs’ means social practices, whereas ‘costumes’ means clothing.
- 8. Fix parallel structure Original: population group or of a nation Suggested revision: population group or nation Why it matters: The coordinated nouns should use the same grammatical structure.
- 9. Add required articles Original: Involvement of any sports star in advertisement Suggested revision: The involvement of a sports star in an advertisement Why it matters: The noun phrases require articles to refer to a representative case clearly.
- 10. Fix clause and number Original: it is the favourite sports of this Nation Suggested revision: that it is this nation's favourite sport Why it matters: The reporting verb needs a ‘that’ clause, and ‘sport’ must be singular after ‘favourite’.
- 11. Use intended expression Original: vague Suggested revision: in vogue Why it matters: ‘In vogue’ means fashionable, while ‘vague’ means unclear.
- 12. Use active construction Original: Shooting of scenes is shown in background of Suggested revision: Scenes are filmed against the backdrop of Why it matters: The revision removes the faulty passive construction and supplies the required article.
Suggested Rewrites
- as well as about country for its culture as well as about a country's culture
- In modern era advertisement In the modern era, advertising
- energising the sale of products boosting product sales
- a lot other benefits a lot of other benefits
- Just By
- the advertisements for few days advertisements for a few days
Why this response received Band 5.5
The response maintains a clear agreement and offers several relevant ways advertising may reflect national life, including sport, clothing, language, and places. Its main limitation is that ideas are presented in one dense block and some examples are unclear or insufficiently connected to the claim, particularly the discussion of overseas filming. Organise the argument into paragraphs and explain fewer examples more precisely, including how each reveals the country being advertised.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
A clear position is maintained and supported with several relevant examples, but development is uneven and some claims remain unclear or contradictory.
Select two or three strong examples and explicitly explain how each one reveals national culture or conditions.
Coherence and Cohesion
The argument follows a broadly understandable sequence, but the absence of paragraphing and weak connections between some points impede progression.
Divide the response into an introduction, focused body paragraphs, and a conclusion, with one controlling idea per paragraph.
Lexical Resource
There is enough vocabulary to discuss advertising and national characteristics, but frequent inaccurate collocations and word choices limit precision.
Prioritise accurate common expressions and correct misused words such as costumes, vague, paid high, and narrates description.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Meaning is generally recoverable, but frequent article, agreement, plural, and sentence-structure errors reduce grammatical control.
Edit each sentence for articles and countable nouns, then simplify passive and multi-clause structures that become awkward.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Advertising can tell you a lot about a country.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.