It is reported that many criminals commit crime again when they are released from prison. What are the causes and how can we solve this problem?
Sample Response
The phenomenon that a number of criminals violate laws again when they are releasedfree from prison has become a major concern worldwide.sparked an intense debate among the general public. This can be attributed to many factors, including social discrimination in employment and the influence of other criminals in prison.in the prison. To address the problem, the government should take immediate and effective measures. First and foremost, it is difficult for law-breakers to find a suitable job which can provide sufficient money for their survival. There is no denying that employers are reluctant to recruit people with criminal records which indicates that they were detrimentalwhich represents the fact that they are detrimental to society in the past. Therefore, failing to find a job may exacerbate their situations since they do not have enough moneyfinance to purchase daily necessities and acquire other services like education and healthcare, forcing them to obtainget money through illegal methods such as robbery and theft. Furthermore, perpetrators breakoffend the law for different reasons, ranging from a lack of legal awareness to others’ misleading instructions. In essence, the imprisonment of those offenders may increase the rate of recidivism due to the fact that they are exposed to other people with serious convictions or criminal intentions.some felonies or bad intentions. Hardened criminals are prone to exert an adverse impact on other minor culprits through instilling their inappropriate worldviews, outlooks on life and values. To alleviate and even eliminate the recidivism,recidivism issues, the government should strengthen vocational training for criminals, encourage enterprises to hire criminals who behave well in prison, and adopt alternative measures to punish and rehabilitate different criminals. To begin with, providing vocational training enables law-breakers to learn practical skills, which layslay a solid foundation for their future jobs. Besides, the local authority or communities should organize campaigns to mitigate their discrimination towards criminals. Thus, people who are released from prison can earn their living through these combined measuresmeasure, reducing crimecriminal rates. More importantly, individuals convicted of minor crimespeople with minor crimes should be punished with alternative measures such as voluntary workworks in communities, which can make compensation tomake compensations for communities directly and give them an opportunitygive them a opportunities to reintegrate into society without great obstacles.
Why this response received Band 7.5
The essay effectively addresses both parts of the prompt by presenting well-developed causes for recidivism and proposing practical solutions. Ideas are logically organized into coherent paragraphs, supported by a strong range of vocabulary and sentence structures. To enhance the overall quality further, focus on refining word choices to avoid occasional awkward phrasing and ensuring prepositions and article agreements are consistently accurate.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
The response fully addresses all parts of the task with clear, relevant causes and logically extended solutions.
Ensure all proposed solutions explicitly connect back to each specific cause discussed in the body paragraphs.
Coherence and Cohesion
Paragraphing is clear and cohesive devices are used effectively to guide the reader through the arguments.
Vary transitional phrases beyond standard cohesive markers to create an even smoother flow between complex ideas.
Lexical Resource
A good range of topic-specific vocabulary is used appropriately, though minor word choice lapses occasionally occur.
Refine collocations and word forms, replacing slightly unnatural expressions like 'mitigate their discrimination' with 'reduce social stigma'.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A mix of complex and compound sentence structures is used accurately with good overall grammatical control.
Pay close attention to minor grammatical details, such as plural noun agreements and correct prepositions.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
It is reported that many criminals commit crime again when they are released from prison. What are the causes and how can we solve this problem?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.